Griefland: An Intimate Portrait of Love, Loss, and Unlikely Friendship

by Armen Bacon, Nancy Miller

Overview

Griefland. It’s a place no one wants to visit—a place without borders where language is inadequate and pain is constant. It’s a place where every morning one awakens to the stark reality that a loved one will never be seen, heard—or embraced—again. This is a place that Armen Bacon and Nancy Miller know all too well, for when they met, both of them had lost a child—a son, Alex, and a daughter, Rachel.

Griefland provides an intimate portrait of what tragedy does to the human soul, how it changes one’s life, and most important, how it can be survived. With achingly beautiful language, this book explores the acute moment-to-moment experience of grief. But it also transcends that and speaks to the redemptive power of friendship, trust, intimacy, and love. Together they discover a will and desire to move forward, recognizing that life is the ultimate prize for those who survive this excruciating journey.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780762780846
Publisher:	Skirt!
Publication date:	10/02/2012
Pages:	168
Sales rank:	443,599
Product dimensions:	5.60(w) x 7.60(h) x 0.90(d)

About the Author

Armen Bacon is a regular contributor to The Fresno Bee and has a daily radio feature titled Live, Laugh, Love. For two decades she has served as a media spokeswoman for education. Nancy Miller has been an English and composition instructor at the university and junior college levels for more than seventeen years.

Table of Contents

Introduction: Dancing in the Dark 1

Armen Remembers Alex 6

Nancy Remembers Rachel 9

First Contact 13

Weathering the Perfect Storm 21

Sorry for Your Loss 27

The Boy Who Wanted to Fly 33

Rachel Is Dead 41

Down the Rabbit Hole 51

The Cemetery Club 67

The Mermaid Diaries 73

Till Death Do Us Part 79

The Dragon Stitch 86

Confessions of a Gypsy 90

Passport to Griefland 95

The Language of Silence 100

Alex, Is That You? 104

Leap of Faith 109

I Wonder if the Palm Trees Are Dancing 112

Where Is She Now? 117

Chipped Nail Polish 120

Time of Death?Forever 122

Still Life 126

Silent Night 130

Duet 134

Round-Trip 138

Lessons from Our Travels 143

Armen's Acknowledgments 153

Nancy's Acknowledgments 156

About the Authors 159

Editorial Reviews

By exploring Griefland together, Armen Bacon and Nancy Miller remind us that the only way to traverse this terrain, so studded with landmines and bottomless chasms, is to hold someone's hand. A journey through Griefland is not a welcome passage, but discovering that you don't have to make it alone makes each step a little easier.

Carla Malden

Armen Bacon and Nancy Miller . . . courageously write their way into the darkest of the dark nights and they refuse to blink. Their writing takes us deep into pain without apology. They are relentless in their prose, in their honesty. . . . Bacon and Miller have survived, continue to survive, and have rendered their journey in a poetic prose that is both heartbreaking and inspiring.

Doug Rice

Loss and grief are definitive in the human condition, and the loss of a child trumps all. In Griefland, Armen Bacon and Nancy Miller conjure an anatomy of loss, and the grim climb back to a livable life after it, even though those lives will be forever changed.

Leslie Heywood

It's the tragedy no one wants to imagine: the death of our child. These moms had me from the first chapter. From the honesty of their raw pain to the ways they helped each other through words that spoke of memories, anger, comfort, and eventual acceptance, I fell in love with the children they lost and the friendship they forged. You will learn, empathize, shed tears, share a laugh—and, if you need it, find comfort from the beautiful words that helped these two authors heal themselves and each other. Full of insight, emotion, and unforgettable images that honor the process of parenting and the value of connection.

Randye Kaye

"By exploring GRIEFLAND together, Armen Bacon and Nancy Miller remind us that the only way to traverse this terrain, so studded with landmines and bottomless chasms, is to hold someone's hand. A journey through Griefland is not a welcome passage, but discovering that you don't have to make it alone makes each step a little easier."—Carla Malden, author of AfterImage "It's the tragedy no one wants to imagine: the death of our child. These moms had me from the first chapter. From the honesty of their raw pain to the ways they helped each other through words that spoke of memories, anger, comfort, and eventual acceptance, I fell in love with the children they lost and the friendship they forged. You will learn, empathize, shed tears, share a laugh—and, if you need it, find comfort from the beautiful words that helped these two authors heal themselves and each other. Full of insight, emotion, and unforgettable images that honor the process of parenting and the value of connection." —Randye Kaye, author of Ben Behind His Voices: One Family's Journey from the Chaos of Schizophrenia to Hope "Loss and grief are definitive in the human condition, and the loss of a child trumps all. In Griefland, Armen Bacon and Nancy Miller conjure an anatomy of loss, and the grim climb back to a livable life after it, even though those lives will be forever changed." —Leslie Heywood, author of Pretty Good for a Girl and The Proving Grounds "Armen Bacon and Nancy Miller . . . courageously write their way into the darkest of the dark nights and they refuse to blink. Their writing takes us deep into pain without apology. They are relentless in their prose, in their honesty. . . . Bacon and Miller have survived, continue to survive, and have rendered their journey in a poetic prose that is both heartbreaking and inspiring." —Doug Rice, author of Dream Memoirs

From the Publisher

Continuing with the theme of suffering parents is this book by Bacon (contributor and columnist, Fresno Bee), and English composition instructor Miller that provides moment-to-moment experiences of grief in the losses of their respective children. The book records the journey they took together while grief stricken. Through an unlikely series of events, the women found each other to lean on and travel with through the uncharted territory. For readers facing similar challenges, here are companions and a sort of map for the road ahead, one in which they will find they are not alone. Recommended for parents who are or will be entering the land of grief, and for those who love them.

Library Journal