Have you ever wished your lover could respond instinctively to your innermost sexual fantasies, almost as if he or she could read your mind? Would you like your sex partner to react naturally to your deepest urges, as if his or her secret cravings were the erotic counterpoint to your own? Have you ever wished you could satisfy your lover's most intimate sexual needs before he or she even realized they had entertained such desires at all? By practicing the mental imaging and sensitivity exercises presented in this practical, step-by-step and clinically based guide, you will enter expanded levels of sexual arousal and fulfillment in as little as a month's time.
Have you ever wished your lover could respond instinctively to your innermost sexual fantasies, almost as if he or she could read your mind? Would you like your sex partner to react naturally to your deepest urges, as if his or her secret cravings were the erotic counterpoint to your own? Have you ever wished you could satisfy your lover's most intimate sexual needs before he or she even realized they had entertained such desires at all? By practicing the mental imaging and sensitivity exercises presented in this practical, step-by-step and clinically based guide, you will enter expanded levels of sexual arousal and fulfillment in as little as a month's time.
Inner Sex In 30 Days: The Erotic Fulfillment Program
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Inner Sex In 30 Days: The Erotic Fulfillment Program
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Overview
Have you ever wished your lover could respond instinctively to your innermost sexual fantasies, almost as if he or she could read your mind? Would you like your sex partner to react naturally to your deepest urges, as if his or her secret cravings were the erotic counterpoint to your own? Have you ever wished you could satisfy your lover's most intimate sexual needs before he or she even realized they had entertained such desires at all? By practicing the mental imaging and sensitivity exercises presented in this practical, step-by-step and clinically based guide, you will enter expanded levels of sexual arousal and fulfillment in as little as a month's time.
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781466876392 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | St. Martin's Press |
| Publication date: | 07/29/2014 |
| Series: | In 30 Days Series |
| Sold by: | Macmillan |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 107 |
| File size: | 274 KB |
About the Author
Keith Harary, Ph.D. has spent decades investigating the issues confronting those who are coping with extraordinary experiences. His research has included extensive laboratory and field research on the physiological and other variables associated with altered states of consciousness, including the development of specialized methods for actively inducing a wide range of altered states.
Harary holds a Ph.D. in psychology, with emphases in both clinical counseling and experimental psychology. He has authored or co-authored hundreds of articles and eight books on topics related to perception, altered states of consciousness, personality, and related topics. He is currently Research Director of the Institute for Advanced Psychology in Tiburon, California, where he continues to conduct research in perception and other areas in association with an interdisciplinary consortium of scientists.
Pamela Weintraub is a longtime magazine journalist living in New York City and the author of thirteen books. She was formerly the editor-in-chief of Omni.
Read an Excerpt
Inner Sex in 30 Days
The Erotic Fulfillment Program
By Keith Harary, Pamela Weintraub
St. Martin's Press
Copyright © 1990 Keith Harary, Ph.D., and Pamela WeintraubAll rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4668-7639-2
CHAPTER 1
DAY 1
FORBIDDEN FRUIT
In one of our all-time favorite short features, created by filmmaker Karen Johnson, the camera focuses so closely on the navel of an orange that we initially believe we are viewing the sexual organs of a beautiful woman. As the camera pans around the peel, the orange gradually spreads open before us, and we come to recognize that we are observing a piece of fruit. Despite the realization, there is still something compellingly sensuous about the image that fills the screen.
To become more attuned to your personal sexual potential, you must first get more in touch with all of your senses. We suggest you start by examining a piece of fruit.
Pick up an orange and look at it closely. Notice its rich, orange color, including any subtle variations in particular spots. Notice its weight and the cool, curved feeling of its skin touching yours. Then slowly roll it around in your hands and feel its shape gently yielding to your fingers as you lightly squeeze it.
Now slowly begin peeling the orange. As you do so, notice the feeling of your fingertips piercing the skin and carefully pulling it away from the inner fruit. Listen to the sound of the skin being pulled apart, and notice the sharp aroma of orange oil drifting into the atmosphere as the peel itself is broken. Notice the aroma growing stronger as you hold the orange closer to your face.
Now pull apart the inner sections so that the entire fruit is spread open in your hands like a soft, orange crystal. Feel the wetness of the orange, notice the softer aroma of its inner juices and the way the surrounding light reflects on its crystalline surfaces.
Finally, completely pull apart the orange and put one entire section in your mouth. Feel its soft wetness on your lips and tongue, then gently pierce it with your teeth and feel the fresh orange juice squirting into your mouth. Feel the texture of the innermost part of the orange on the inside of your mouth. Chew the orange until you have extracted the sweet, pungent orangeness that is the essence of this fruit. Then swallow and feel the orange moving down your throat and into your body. As you consume the rest of the orange, continue paying full attention to all of your senses in the same fashion.
Sensual Suggestion — You may repeat this exercise as often as you like throughout the four weeks of the Erotic Fulfillment Program and, of course, beyond. In the future, moreover, you may wish to use a variety of other citrus fruits, including tangerines, grapefruits, lemons, limes, and tangelos. We also recommend expanding this exercise to include a variety of sensuous berries — raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, blueberries, and cranberries — and such stimulating fruits as kiwis, pineapples, and mangoes. (Try cutting a kiwi or a mango in half and sucking out the insides with your lips and tongue.) Compare the many different types of sensory experiences that you have with each of these fruits, paying attention not only to their very different tastes, but also to the different ways they smell, sound; and feel in your hands and mouth.
DAY 2
EROTIC REFUGE
Begin today's exercise by sitting in the middle of your bedroom and calmly looking around. Is your bedroom a sensual environment especially conducive to the expression of your inner sexuality? Do the colors and textures work to enhance your sexuality, or to repress it? Is your bedroom a soft, inviting refuge from the world at large? Or does the outside world intrude itself into this private realm in subtle or not-so-subtle ways?
For instance, does your bedroom window look out upon a magnificent ocean vista, or across a narrow, garbage can–filled alley directly into the kitchen window of the apartment next door? Are books or papers from work piled on a desk or table, or lying on the floor around your bed? Have you left your clothes and shoes in a heap by the door? Is the bed a comfortable place where you can luxuriate in the full-blown throes of spontaneous sexual passion, a convertible sofa bed that must be pulled out before you can go to sleep, or a worn-out, lumpy mattress you found on the sidewalk five years ago, then dragged home and threw on the floor? Does a television set occupy such a central position in the room that you can't avoid looking directly at it while lying in bed on your back? What sort of pictures, if any, are hanging on your walls?
Once you have taken a mental inventory of your bedroom environment, you should move to transform it into an erotic refuge. Your erotic refuge should be a room in which you can emotionally leave the outside world outside. It should, most of all, be a completely safe and private realm in which you may tune in to and explore your sexuality in a totally uninhibited way.
Turning your bedroom into an erotic zone may take several days and require a small investment. But the effort will be worth it, paying dividends by enhancing your overall emotional state and your level of sexual awareness. We suggest that you begin transforming your bedroom environment today. If appropriate, you may share the experience with your partner as a way of reaffirming your commitment to your emotional and sexual relationship.
Begin by clearing the room of any objects that make it seem cluttered or distract you from feeling fully focused on your sexual partner. Do not enter this particular room unless you have first removed your shoes. Also make sure the room is strictly a bedroom — clear it of any objects that make the room seem partly living room, say, or partly bathroom or office or closet.
Sensual Suggestion — To avoid the feel of a closet, arrange the room so you won't be tempted to just toss your clothes on the floor. Reorganize the dresser drawers or closet especially for this purpose, or set up a corner chair where you can neatly hang your clothes after taking them off.
Sensual Suggestion — If your quarters are cramped, and you must use your bedroom for more than one purpose — for instance, if you must equip it with a desk and computer — try to use screens, colorful cloth hangings, or curtains to divide the distracting area off. Even if you live in a studio apartment, you can still turn a corner of it into an enticing erotic zone that exists apart from the rest of the apartment and the world around it.
Remove from your erotic refuge any object, picture, or piece of furniture that reminds you of any former lovers. (If this is impossible, just change the room as much as possible and rearrange the furniture for a fresh start.) Clean the room thoroughly so that you feel completely comfortable touching any surface — including the floor — with your totally naked body. If the room is desperately in need of paint, go ahead and paint it. Choose soothing, sexually stimulating colors such as mauve, pale scarlet, or champagne.
Also pay particular attention to art or decorations adorning your wall. Art should reflect your innermost erotic desires and tastes, whatever they may be. However, wall decorations often work best on your unconscious mind when they are subtle. A still life of hot pink peaches or uncut fruit may be more sexually suggestive than a current pinup, for instance. A picture of roving lions or athletes stretching to cross the finish line may — or, depending upon your taste, may not — be more titillating than a pornographic photo. You may also feel turned on by impressionistic drawings, photographs or paintings of dancers, or by pictures of you and your lover together at various moments in your lives.
If the room is not carpeted, place a comfortable throw rug, big enough for you and your lover to stretch out upon, on the floor. Put some fresh plants or flowers in the room, along with other natural objects such as seashells, feathers, colorful rocks, or fossils. An aquarium with exotic and colorful tropical fish and internal lights is particularly sensual. So are red or pink light bulbs, which may be purchased in a variety store and placed in any lamp.
Sensual Suggestion — Red light may endow you and your lover with an ethereal, almost otherworldly appearance. Many people find that the red glow intensifies erotic communication and sexual arousal.
Make sure that your erotic refuge is absolutely private. If your window looks out on a beautiful setting, make sure that no one within that setting may peer in. If your view is less than comforting or serene, cover your window with an attractive shade, blind, or curtain. Soft fabrics are particularly sensual. If the room feels small and confining, expand its optical dimensions with mirrors or broad areas of contrasting color.
Sensual Suggestion — No matter what the size of your room, we suggest you set up at least one attractive full-length mirror. This will be essential in many of the exercises that follow. We do not believe it is necessary, however, to go so far as to mirror the ceiling above your bed.
Pay special attention to the condition and position of your bed. Cover the bed in clean sheets and a comforter or blanket, using soft textures that feel especially comfortable next to your bare skin. Toss a variety of different-sized pillows on the bed, not just the more traditional pillows that most of us are accustomed to using when we go to sleep. If at all possible, your bed should occupy the central position in the room. It should be absolutely clean and thoroughly comfortable.
If you feel you cannot survive without a television in your bedroom, leave it unplugged and place it in the corner. In the same fashion, if there is a telephone in your bedroom, switch it off or unplug it whenever you are about to use the room as an erotic refuge and do not wish to be disturbed. (If need be, hook up an answering machine to the phone line in an adjacent room so that you won't be distracted by concerns over missing important calls.)
Arrange a source of music for your erotic refuge. Whether you choose a turntable, CD, or tape player, you should ideally be able to adjust the volume and change the musical selections without having to leave the room for another part of your home. If this is impossible, then there should be speakers leading into the room from your musical source, which should be able to play a continuous series of musical selections for at least an hour to an hour and a half. We suggest that you avoid using a radio to provide the musical background for your erotic refuge. Radio announcers are notorious for destroying the mood of a piece of music by talking over the beginning and end of a song and for broadcasting commercials between selections. The radio also offers you little personal choice over the specific musical selections you'll be hearing.
Complete your erotic refuge with a fantasy wardrobe to be worn whenever you and your partner are at home alone together. Contemporary clothing is often tight and overtailored, dividing the body into different segments with such things as tight belts and ties. Zippers and buttons can also hinder eroticism, as can the feeling of synthetic fabrics against your skin. As a more erotic change of pace, try to get into the habit of changing into loose, flowing clothes when you return home at the end of the day. Even if this isn't always practical, you should still change into such clothes whenever you and your partner are about to share a sexual encounter in your erotic refuge. We suggest wearing such items as silk and satin kimonos, robes, or pajamas. These sensual garments, which should allow you to experience the natural and uninhibited sexuality of your body, are preferable to the overstated fashions you generally find in erotic-wear boutiques.
Finally, we suggest that you consider the bathroom closest to your bedroom. In the course of the Erotic Fulfillment Program, you will be sharing romantic and sexually stimulating baths and showers with your partner. Beyond this, the state of your bathroom environment is an intimate expression of how you feel about your body. It is the room in which you clean your body in preparation for a sexual encounter, and it is often the room in which you will find yourself — for one reason or another — either during a sexual experience or shortly after a sexual encounter is completed. It should therefore be kept scrupulously clean and inviting, using the same sorts of general techniques you used in preparing your erotic bedroom environment.
Place a clean and cozy rug on the bathroom floor, and make sure there are plenty of clean, large, thick, and absorbent cotton towels available at all times. It is often not the most exotic sex aids that make the difference in our enjoyment of a given sexual encounter, but, rather, the simple niceties of life.
In addition, the bathroom should not be the place where you store your beloved collection of exotic mushrooms or your ten-year collection of Popular Mechanics magazines. Rather, it should be a well-kept erotic environment that openly expresses your inner sensitivity to your own and your partner's sexuality.
DAY 3
INSIDE MOVES
As children, most of us have enormous intuitive and imaginative resources. However, we often lose touch with these qualities as adults. Writers, musicians, and artists are sometimes exceptions, tapping these inner resources to create their most powerful works. Their creations are sometimes said to "pop into" their minds from "someplace else" — as if the words or music on a page have been transcribed from some "inner dictation," or as if an "inner artist" has guided the application of paint to canvas.
Of course, the inner writer, artist, or musician is not a manifestation of some outside force but, rather, an active expression of that individual's innermost imagination. Often, this inner voice gives rise to more true passion and insight than our conscious, analytic selves. To help you tap your own inner voice, we present an elaborate guided imagery technique, in which you will follow instructions prerecorded on tape. While today's exercise, practiced in a warm, sensual bath, does not require that you focus on specific, sexual images, it should awaken your inner muse. The result should be enhanced performance in a variety of creative activities, including your ability to experience a more intuitive form of sex.
Sensual Suggestion — Because the exercise for Day 3 is rather complex, we suggest that you read all the instructions twice before proceeding.
To get in touch with your unconscious self on Day 3, you must first enter the altered state of alert relaxation, in which the mind remains alert while the body becomes extremely relaxed. Athletes often enter this altered state of consciousness to mentally rehearse their maneuvers. The combination of relaxation and alertness allows them to establish a deep communion with their bodies; finely tuned mental control of muscle movements is often the result. In the same way, alert relaxation will help you mentally explore — and ultimately intensify — your deepest, most sensual feelings. A new appreciation of your emotional, sexual self should emerge.
After you have entered the state of alert relaxation, you will mentally drift for three minutes. Then the guided-imagery part of the exercise (adapted in part from techniques described in Sexual Secrets by Nik Douglas and Penny Slinger) can begin.
To prepare, first have a special lover or friend record the instructions below on a cassette recorder. You should listen to the tape while enjoying a hot bath.
Sensual Suggestion — If, like many Erotic Fulfillment Program participants, you are moving through all the exercises with a single partner, you may make tapes for each other. If you prefer to practice this exercise completely on your own, you may record the instructions yourself.
The person reading the instructions should speak slowly and pause for the amount of time indicated. When the word PAUSE appears alone, simply pause for a second or two. The words to be recorded follow.
Take a deep breath, let it out slowly, stretch your muscles, and relax. Now imagine that warm currents of mental energy are very slowly moving up through the soles of your feet toward your ankles.
* * *
Feel the muscles in your feet gradually warming and relaxing as you imagine the currents passing through them. [PAUSE] Imagine that the currents continue moving up through your calves, [PAUSE] into your thighs, [PAUSE] through your hips [PAUSE] and buttocks, [PAUSE] and into your lower back and abdomen. [PAUSE] Proceed very slowly, giving yourself time for each group of muscles to begin fully relaxing before allowing the imaginary currents to move on to the next area of your body. [PAUSE] Feel the muscles in your legs becoming heavy, warm, and relaxed, and sinking down into the tub beneath you. [PAUSE]
* * *
When you feel your legs becoming deeply relaxed, imagine the currents moving in a clockwise motion around your abdomen, [PAUSE] up along your spine, [PAUSE] and through the front of your torso into your chest [PAUSE] and shoulders. Feel the muscles in your stomach and lower back releasing any tightness or tension as the current passes through them. [PAUSE] Allow a feeling of general well-being to begin flowing through your body along with the imaginary currents as you continue to relax. [PAUSE]
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Inner Sex in 30 Days by Keith Harary, Pamela Weintraub. Copyright © 1990 Keith Harary, Ph.D., and Pamela Weintraub. Excerpted by permission of St. Martin's Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
Contents
TITLE PAGE,COPYRIGHT NOTICE,
DEDICATION,
INTRODUCTION,
WEEK ONE: THE SENSUAL SELF,
DAY 1. FORBIDDEN FRUIT,
DAY 2. EROTIC REFUGE,
DAY 3. INSIDE MOVES,
DAY 4. SEXUAL CENTER,
DAY 5. ONE ON ONE,
DAY 6. SELF-PLEASURING,
DAY 7. CIRCULAR MOTION,
WEEK TWO: ENTERING THE EROTIC ZONE,
DAY 8. FIRST COMMUNION,
DAY 9. WORKING OUT,
DAY 10. MYSTIC MASSAGE,
DAY 11. LOVE BITES,
DAY 12. CRIES AND WHISPERS,
DAY 13. OBJECTS OF DESIRE,
DAY 14. DREAM WEAVERS,
WEEK THREE: INTUITIVE SEX,
DAY 15. FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE,
DAY 16. MIRRORING,
DAY 17. TRANSPERSONAL FOCUSING,
DAY 18. WITHIN YOU AND WITHOUT YOU,
DAY 19. ANDROGYNOUS ACTS,
DAY 20. ANIMAL ATTRACTION,
DAY 21. FIELD OF DREAMS,
WEEK FOUR: COSMIC CONNECTIONS,
DAY 22. FIRST DATE,
DAY 23. LAST COMMUNION,
DAY 24. STONE SONGS,
DAY 25. EARTHLY DELIGHTS,
DAY 26. ALTERED STATE ORGASM,
DAY 27. A SPACE ODYSSEY,
DAY 28. THE OUTER LIMITS,
DAYS 29 AND 30. THE LOST WEEKEND,
A SPECIAL NOTE TO THE PHYSICALLY DISABLED,
FOR FURTHER READING,
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS,
ABOUT THE AUTHORS,
COPYRIGHT,