Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

by Laura Markham

Overview

Popular parenting expert Dr. Laura Markham, author of PEACEFUL PARENTS, HAPPY SIBLINGS, has garnered a large and loyal readership around the world, thanks to her simple, insightful approach that values the emotional bond between parent and child. As any parent of more than one child knows, though, it’s challenging for even the most engaged parent to maintain harmony and a strong connection when competition, tempers, and irritation run high.
 
In this highly anticipated guide, Dr. Markham presents simple yet powerful ways to cut through the squabbling and foster a loving, supportive bond between siblings, while giving each child the vital connection that he or she needs.

PEACEFUL PARENT, HAPPY SIBLINGS includes hands-on, research-based advice on:
 

• Creating deep connections with each one of your children, so that each truly believes that you couldn’t possibly love anyone else more.
• Fostering a loving family culture that encourages laughter and minimizes fighting
• Teaching your children healthy emotional self-management and conflict resolution skills—so that they can work things out with each other, get their own needs met and respect the needs of others
• Helping your kids forge a close lifelong sibling bond—as well as the relationship skills they will need for a life of healthy friendships, work relationships, and eventually their own family bonds.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780399168451
Publisher:	Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date:	05/05/2015
Pages:	352
Sales rank:	100,670
Product dimensions:	5.40(w) x 8.20(h) x 1.00(d)
Age Range:	18 Years

About the Author

Dr. Laura Markham is the author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How To Stop Yelling and Start Connecting, published by Perigee in November 2012. 

Dr. Markham earned her Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology at Columbia University in New York.  Her clinical practice is entirely devoted to coaching parents, with clients from New York to Australia (via Skype).  She monitors the pulse of parents’ needs through her very active social network, including her own web site, AhaParenting.com. She speaks frequently with reporters for press as diverse as CNN and Parents Magazine and makes regular TV appearances. Dr. Markham lives in Park Slope, Brooklyn, with her family—and considers her kids – a daughter graduating from high school and a son graduating from an Ivy League university—to be proof that her parenting approach produces responsible, self-disciplined, considerate and happy kids who achieve in the world and stay deeply connected to their parents.

What People are Saying About This

From the Publisher

“This book delivers hope and help. Laura Markham brilliantly applies her respectful, attuned, limit-setting approach to sibling dynamics. Full of realistic scenarios and scripts for how parents can turn conflict into opportunities to build skills, and turn parental dread into meaningful intervention. Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings masterfully coaches parents on how to honor each child’s experience, set limits, reduce conflict, and build skills for life.” 
—Tina Payne Bryson, PhD, co-author of The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline

“Parents need all the help they can get to be the kind of parent they want to be, and to use parenting skills that influence their children to be good citizens of the world. Dr. Laura’s book is filled with this kind of help—practical, inspiring, and encouraging though real-life examples. It would have helped me a lot when I was raising my children.” 
—Dr. Jane Nelsen, author and co-author of the Positive Discipline series

“Finally, a book that answers your questions around sibling rivalry! In this insightful book, Dr. Markham draws on scientific research to craft smart strategies that any parent can use to help their children resolve their conflicts with empathy, mindfulness and peace. A must-read for every parent.”
—Dr. Shefali Tsabary, author of The Conscious Parent and Out of Control

“Adding a child to the family creates a cascade of challenges. Dr. Laura Markham shows parents how to avoid common sibling difficulties, and how to convey their love, even in stressful situations, so children truly feel supported. Open this book, and you'll find clarity, wisdom, workable ideas, and generous helpings of respect for parents and children.”
—Patty Wipfler, founder, Hand in Hand Parenting

"Refreshingly positive and respectful in its tone, Peaceful Parents, Happy Siblings lovingly guides parents by using scripts and practical examples, essential tools for any parent with more than one child. Dr. Laura's compassionate approach is empowering for parents, and liberating for children."
—Lysa Parker and Barbara Nicholson, Founders of Attachment Parenting International, and authors of Attached at the Heart

“Brothers and sisters rejoice!  Here's a family roadmap to transform bickering kids into a connected sibling team. One third of kids have a warm caring relationship with their siblings. Read this book and your family can join the ranks.”
—Heather Shumaker, author of It's Okay Not to Share

“A phenomenal book for parents with multiple children! Dr. Markham addresses all of the common sibling issues with sensible solutions to bring peace and foster healthy relationships between siblings. This book will be my constant companion for years to come.”
—Rebecca Eanes, author of Lasting Bonds: Building Connected Families Through Positive Parenting

“Whether you are just beginning to contemplate having a second child or you are already frustrated by nonstop sibling fighting, this book is for you. I marveled at the amount of wisdom, compassion, and practical ideas packed into its pages. The wisdom begins with her gentle reminder that we have to start with ourselves if we want to make meaningful changes in our children’s relationships with each other. The compassion is in Dr. Laura’s empathy for everyone in the mix—including angry and worried parents. And the ideas aren’t just practical and usable—many of them are downright fun. You’ll laugh out loud just reading them, and everyone will laugh when you try them out. Wouldn’t that be a nice change from bickering and clobbering?”
—Lawrence J. Cohen, PhD, author of Playful Parenting

“As a parenting coach, I know that sibling struggles can be heart-wrenching for parents. Dr. Laura's strategies are right on the money to help today's parents create more peaceful homes - and stronger sibling relationships. Great work!”
—Amy McCready, founder of Positive Parenting Solutions and author of If I Have to Tell You One More Time  and The “Me, Me, Me” Epidemic

“This book walks parents through sibling scenarios – even ones for very intense children – and breaks down the specifics of how to approach common struggles, without making parents feel guilty or overwhelmed. It is a wonderful resource that gives parents the tools to not only help our children while in the midst of conflict, but also helps us to teach our children how to be the loving, kind and respectful brothers and sisters we know they can be.” 
— Gina Osher, The Twin Coach

“If you are the parent of more than one child, this is the book for you. Laura Markham begins at the beginning – the how and when to tell your child that they are about to become a big brother or sister — and then offers concrete suggestions to help you lay down the foundation for a healthy sibling relationship throughout your children’s lives. I know that I will highly recommend this book to all my clients.” 
—Rev. Susan Nason parent educator

" Dr. Laura's examples and coaching-based methodology make parenting siblings far less daunting....Her book reassures us that doing our best with the right tools, including self-regulation, connection, and coaching, can build a much happier and more peaceful family."
—Nancy Peplinsky, Founder & Executive Director of Holistic Moms Network

Editorial Reviews

03/02/2015
In the peaceful parenting household, there are no time-outs. Stickers, toys, and candy are not rewards for good behavior. And when it comes to siblings, children aren’t taught to share, but to take turns. With this book, Markham (Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids) aims to help readers effect a subtle but powerful paradigm shift and raise children who are self-regulated and driven by empathy rather than a reward/punishment dynamic. Model conversations are idealized but artfully crafted—“I guess it hurt your feelings when your sister wouldn’t let you play with her and her friend... you still can’t stand outside her door and scream like that, sweetie”—and provide an entire vocabulary for the book’s philosophy. The book’s third part is directed specifically toward parents anticipating baby number two, but other chapters offer more than enough solutions for parents already up to their elbows in sibling rivalries and fights. The book draws on scientific studies as much as possible, but the available research findings are often inconclusive. Markham makes her case most through common sense, putting the responsibility on parents to exemplify peaceful, positive behavior that uplifts the entire family.(May)

Publishers Weekly

This book delivers hope and help. Laura Markham brilliantly applies her respectful, attuned, limit-setting approach to sibling dynamics. Full of realistic scenarios and scripts for how parents can turn conflict into opportunities to build skills, and turn parental dread into meaningful intervention. Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings masterfully coaches parents on how to honor each child’s experience, set limits, reduce conflict, and build skills for life.” 
—Tina Payne Bryson, PhD, co-author of The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline

“Parents need all the help they can get to be the kind of parent they want to be, and to use parenting skills that influence their children to be good citizens of the world. Dr. Laura’s book is filled with this kind of help—practical, inspiring, and encouraging though real-life examples. It would have helped me a lot when I was raising my children.” 
—Dr. Jane Nelsen, author and co-author of the Positive Discipline series

“Finally, a book that answers your questions around sibling rivalry! In this insightful book, Dr. Markham draws on scientific research to craft smart strategies that any parent can use to help their children resolve their conflicts with empathy, mindfulness and peace. A must-read for every parent.”
—Dr. Shefali Tsabary, author of The Conscious Parent and Out of Control

“Adding a child to the family creates a cascade of challenges. Dr. Laura Markham shows parents how to avoid common sibling difficulties, and how to convey their love, even in stressful situations, so children truly feel supported. Open this book, and you'll find clarity, wisdom, workable ideas, and generous helpings of respect for parents and children.”
—Patty Wipfler, founder, Hand in Hand Parenting

"Refreshingly positive and respectful in its tone, Peaceful Parents, Happy Siblings lovingly guides parents by using scripts and practical examples, essential tools for any parent with more than one child. Dr. Laura's compassionate approach is empowering for parents, and liberating for children."
—Lysa Parker and Barbara Nicholson, Founders of Attachment Parenting International, and authors of Attached at the Heart

“Brothers and sisters rejoice!  Here's a family roadmap to transform bickering kids into a connected sibling team. One third of kids have a warm caring relationship with their siblings. Read this book and your family can join the ranks.”
—Heather Shumaker, author of It's Okay Not to Share

“A phenomenal book for parents with multiple children! Dr. Markham addresses all of the common sibling issues with sensible solutions to bring peace and foster healthy relationships between siblings. This book will be my constant companion for years to come.”
—Rebecca Eanes, author of Lasting Bonds: Building Connected Families Through Positive Parenting

“Whether you are just beginning to contemplate having a second child or you are already frustrated by nonstop sibling fighting, this book is for you. I marveled at the amount of wisdom, compassion, and practical ideas packed into its pages. The wisdom begins with her gentle reminder that we have to start with ourselves if we want to make meaningful changes in our children’s relationships with each other. The compassion is in Dr. Laura’s empathy for everyone in the mix—including angry and worried parents. And the ideas aren’t just practical and usable—many of them are downright fun. You’ll laugh out loud just reading them, and everyone will laugh when you try them out. Wouldn’t that be a nice change from bickering and clobbering?”
—Lawrence J. Cohen, PhD, author of Playful Parenting

“As a parenting coach, I know that sibling struggles can be heart-wrenching for parents. Dr. Laura's strategies are right on the money to help today's parents create more peaceful homes - and stronger sibling relationships. Great work!”
—Amy McCready, founder of Positive Parenting Solutions and author of If I Have to Tell You One More Time  and The “Me, Me, Me” Epidemic

“This book walks parents through sibling scenarios – even ones for very intense children – and breaks down the specifics of how to approach common struggles, without making parents feel guilty or overwhelmed. It is a wonderful resource that gives parents the tools to not only help our children while in the midst of conflict, but also helps us to teach our children how to be the loving, kind and respectful brothers and sisters we know they can be.” 
— Gina Osher, The Twin Coach

“If you are the parent of more than one child, this is the book for you. Laura Markham begins at the beginning – the how and when to tell your child that they are about to become a big brother or sister — and then offers concrete suggestions to help you lay down the foundation for a healthy sibling relationship throughout your children’s lives. I know that I will highly recommend this book to all my clients.” 
—Rev. Susan Nason parent educator

" Dr. Laura's examples and coaching-based methodology make parenting siblings far less daunting....Her book reassures us that doing our best with the right tools, including self-regulation, connection, and coaching, can build a much happier and more peaceful family."
—Nancy Peplinsky, Founder & Executive Director of Holistic Moms Network

“In the peaceful parenting household, there are no time-outs. Stickers, toys, and candy are not rewards for good behavior. And when it comes to siblings, children aren’t taught to share, but to take turns. With this book, Markham (Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids) aims to help readers effect a subtle but powerful paradigm shift and raise children who are self-regulated and driven by empathy rather than a reward/punishment dynamic. Model conversations are idealized but artfully crafted—“I guess it hurt your feelings when your sister wouldn’t let you play with her and her friend... you still can’t stand outside her door and scream like that, sweetie”—and provide an entire vocabulary for the book’s philosophy. The book’s third part is directed specifically toward parents anticipating baby number two, but other chapters offer more than enough solutions for parents already up to their elbows in sibling rivalries and fights. The book draws on scientific studies as much as possible, but the available research findings are often inconclusive. Markham makes her case most through common sense, putting the responsibility on parents to exemplify peaceful, positive behavior that uplifts the entire family.”
—Publishers Weekly

From the Publisher