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    Becoming Jewish: The Challenges, Rewards, and Paths to Conversion

    Becoming Jewish: The Challenges, Rewards, and Paths to Conversion

    3.0 2

    by Steven Carr Rabbi Reuben, Jennifer S. Hanin, Bob Saget (Foreword by)


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    Steven Carr Reuben is senior rabbi of Kehillat Israel Reconstructionist Congregation in California, the largest Reconstructionist congregation in the world. He is an avid speaker, author of numerous books, including There's an Easter Egg on Your Seder Plate: Surviving Your Child's Interfaith Marriage, articles, and blog videos on interfaith issues online and in publications ranging from USA Today to The New York Post. He lives in Pacific Palisades, California.

    Jennifer S. Hanin is a freelance writer, author, blogger, and a convert to Judaism. She is the author of What to Do When You Can't Get Pregnant and lives in southern California.

    Table of Contents

    Foreword by Bob Saget
    Acknowledgments

    Introduction: The Inspiration for Becoming Jewish

    Chapter 1: Finding New Meaning
    Making the TransitionWhat Defines a Jew?Why is Culture so Important?Why Convert?What Is Involved?Choosing a Hebrew NameGetting StartedRabbi ShoppingFinding Community Online
    The Right Rabbi for YouJewish Denominations
    Do You Need to Learn Hebrew?Will Your Children Need to Convert?Using this Book

    Chapter 2: Belonging vs. Believing
    Belief-Based Religion
    Belonging-Based Religion
    Will Jews Accept You as a Convert?
    Will Family and Friends Accept You?
    What Does “Religious” Mean?
    Labels Belong on Products
    More than a Religion
    Your Jewish Inheritance Room
    Developing Your Own Jewish Customs

    Chapter 3: Telling Family & Friends
    Topics Considered Taboo
    Be Honest
    Find a Neutral Setting
    Gaining Support
    Do it for You
    More Than You Bargained For
    Those Awkward Moments
    Start Living It

    Chapter 4: Hitting the Books
    Choosing Your Path
    Seeing with a Jewish Set of Eyes
    TMI!
    Just Do It

    Chapter 5: Learning an Ancient Language
    Really? Is Hebrew Required?
    Language of the Torah
    Curl Up with the Dead Sea Scrolls
    Help!
    But It Looks So Different
    Your Secret Decoder Ring
    Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained
    Worth the Effort

    Chapter 6: Honoring Shabbat
    Rock Star Status
    Making Shabbat Yours
    The Three Traditional Shabbat Rituals
    A Blessing for Children
    Do-It-Yourself Shabbat
    Weekly Farewell Party

    Chapter 7: Holidays & Holy Days
    Early or Late?
    More Holidays than You Can Shake a Lulav At
    Make Your Sukkah Shine
    The Miracle of Religious Freedom
    The Three-Hour Meal

    Chapter 8: Facing the Bet DinBehind the Bet DinUse “We” TermsDon’t Sweat It
    Assessing Your Intent
    Cramming Sold Separately

    Chapter 9: Mikvah and More
    The Mikvah
    Modesty Takes a Backseat
    Conversion Ceremony
    Circumcision
    Hatafat Dam BritBrit Milah
    Brit Milah for NewbornsCalming Conversion Jitters
    Chapter 10: Tradition
    Why Tradition Matters
    More Than a Nursery
    Tying the Knot
    R.I.P.
    Sacred Rituals & Customs
    Knowing What’s Important
    Cornerstones of Judaism
    Making it Work

    Chapter 11: Living Single
    The Many Meanings of “Family” Finding Your Own “Jewish Mother”Don’t Amputate Your Past

    Chapter 12: All This for a Wedding?
    Turning Two Into One
    More Than Art
    Four Poles and Some FrabicWalking in CirclesGetting to “I Do”Sheva Berachot (Seven Blessings) The Plain Gold BandThe Groom Wore Steel-Toed ShoesGetting a GetChapter 13: Raising Jewish KidsHang On! Help is On Its Way
    Q & A
    Live It Yourself
    Chapter 14: Adult B’nai Mitzvah and Beyond Rite of Passage
    Facing Your Fears
    What Can You Expect?
    Adult B’nai Mitzvah Syllabus—Conservative
    What Else Can You Learn?
    Virtual Learning

    Chapter 15: Is Madonna Jewish?
    Understanding the Roots
    What is Kabbalah?The Five Layers
    Kabbalah is Jewish
    Kabbalah is NOT JudaismTrying Pop KabbalahIs Kabbalah for You?
    Chapter 16: Do They Hate You Too?
    Centuries of Jew Hating
    Eyes Wide Open
    Should You Be Concerned?
    Is There a Bull’s-Eye on Your Back?
    Fertile Grounds for Antisemites
    How to Avoid Haters
    What Can You Do About It?
    Reporting Hate Crimes & Beyond
    You’re Not Alone
    Wave of Holocaust Denial
    Finding the Jewish Activist in You
    Show Your Chutzpah

    Chapter 17: Everyone Matters
    The Gloved One
    Why So Many Lawyers?
    Making it Your Own

    Chapter 18: Children of Israel
    It Just Feels Different
    Bill Said it Best
    Peace of Pipedream?
    Act for Israel
    All Corners of the Globe
    Am Yisrael Chai!

    Appendix I: Thirty-Nine Types of Work Forbidden On ShabbatAppendix II: Conversion Course-Orthodox

    Glossary
    ResourcesIndex

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    Becoming Jewish is the first all-inclusive, step-by-step guide to converting to Judaism. Steven Carr Reuben, a highly respected rabbi, and Jennifer S. Hanin, a convert to the faith, lead readers through the conversion process, providing the right mix of advice, resources and humor for the journey.
    Jews-to-be often find the steps to Judaism foreign, complex, and mysterious. From learning an ancient language, to entering the mikvah (ritual bath), to choosing a Hebrew name, to circumcision, to appearing before a bet din (Jewish court), becoming a Jew is anything but quick and easy. In this engaging and accessible guide, Reuben and Hanin offer practical wisdom for every step of conversion, including:

    • telling family and friends
    • selecting a denomination
    • choosing a rabbi
    • understanding Jewish rituals
    • celebrating Jewish holidays
    • putting aside childhood holidays
    • keeping ties to the past
    • advice on weddings, raising kids, and more

    Throughout, the authors focus on developing a healthy spiritual life, while helping readers understand what it means to be Jewish, absorb Jewish teachings, and live a Jewish life.

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    Publishers Weekly
    Conversion to Judaism usually occurs when a non-Jewish person falls in love with a Jew and the two determine that a common religious faith will make for a happier marriage. Co-author Hanin took a different route. She was already married to a Jew and was the mother of three-year old twins when she became friendly with a Jewish woman, attended her synagogue, and found there a sense of warmth that led to her conversion. Deciding to write about her experience, Hanin met Reuben, a Reconstructionist rabbi, who shared her views. The result of their collaboration is this wise and edifying guidebook to the process by which someone chooses to become a Jew. The authors spell out not only the steps to be taken, but also provide a wealth of information about Jewish traditions, practices, and customs. Their topics include: choosing a rabbi and a Jewish denomination; dealing with family and friends; observing the holidays; facing the religious court (Bet Din); raising children; anti-Semitism; and more. This second aspect of the presentation is so enlightening that all readers -- non-Jews and Jews, who can learn some unfamiliar aspects of their own religion – will find the book highly instructive. (Oct.)
    Library Journal
    There is a long-standing tradition that, given the oppression that Jews have often faced, rabbis should make every effort to discourage would-be converts. Reuben (senior rabbi, Kehillat Israel Reconstructionist Congregation) and freelance writer Hanin, a convert to Judaism, by contrast, explain to the curious what conversion is apt to be like and address questions and issues that are likely to arise (Hebrew, Shabbat, kosher, Kabbalah, Israel, differing denominations). They instruct the reader on Judaism's this-world focus and its status as a religion that emphasizes belonging over belief and the value of every person. VERDICT Short chapters and a simple style make this an excellent choice for interested readers and perhaps the first book any rabbi ought to hand a would-be convert. With a foreword by actor and comedian Bob Saget.

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