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    Bream Gives Me Hiccups

    Bream Gives Me Hiccups

    2.3 3

    by Jesse Eisenberg


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      ISBN-13: 9780802190819
    • Publisher: Grove/Atlantic, Inc.
    • Publication date: 08/31/2015
    • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
    • Format: eBook
    • Pages: 256
    • File size: 2 MB

    Jesse Eisenberg is an Academy Award-nominated actor, playwright, and contributor for the New Yorker and McSweeney’s. He is the author of three plays, Asuncion, The Revisionist, and The Spoils, which won the Theater Visions Fund Award. Eisenberg’s acting credits include The Social Network, Now You See Me, Adventureland, The Squid and the Whale, The Double, and The End of the Tour. Forthcoming acting credits include Batman v. Superman.

    Interviews

    Barnes & Noble Review Interview with Jesse Eisenberg

    Most first associate the name Jesse Eisenberg to his awkward, perpetually teenage mumblings on the silver screen. He makes his living off acting — artfully so in films like The Social Network and To Rome with Love. He's charmingly staved off massacres in Zombieland and correctly identified Lou Reed song titles in The Squid and the Whale. He can even soon be seen freshly shorn, while portraying Lex Luthor in Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice. Yet Eisenberg has also shown impressive prowess when laying down words to paper (or pixels). Besides penning and staging three well-received theatrical productions, he's published short stories and other works with The New Yorker and McSweeny's. Many of the humorous stories originally published in the latter now see a broader audience by inclusion in Eisenberg's debut collection, Bream Gives Me Hiccups, released this month via Grove Atlantic. Eisenberg recently took a break from filming a new Woody Allen flick to speak with the Barnes & Noble Review by phone about opening day anxieties, drunk carrier pigeon messages, New York neuroticism, Candy Crush, and skipping the comment section. The following interview is an edited transcript of that conversation. — Beca Grimm

    The Barnes & Noble Review: How do you feel about the book coming out?

    Jesse Eisenberg: I guess I feel nervous. My regular job is so public: usually when a movie's released there's just a barrage of horrible things going on. I feel nervous and I really love it. I'm so flattered that a publishing company would put it out. I'm honored that people who've read it have liked it. But mostly nervous for the inevitable barrage of criticisms.

    BNR: How do you feel a book coming out is different from a movie coming out? How do you prepare yourself for hearing reviews about it?

    JE: I try to stay away from reviews. They can be really distracting and not very helpful. It's my limited experience — with this book — people who are reading a book spend an intimate experience with a book for two hours, reading on their own. It requires a lot of participation on the part of the reader. Their response is going to be a little more sensitive and nuanced than a typical moviegoer's response. You see movies in a group. Usually there isn't a required participation with the audience. You end up getting — from a casual moviegoer — a chronic knee-jerk reaction that a book doesn't really inspire.

    BNR: Do you also think this book is more personal than appearing in a movie, because this is coming from your brain?

    JE: Yes. On the other hand, when you're in a movie, you're emoting and your face is in it. So in a way, a movie is very personal as well, because strangers are watching your face. It's like the worst experience from high school. On an international level. People making fun of your clothes and your dumb face, your stupid haircut in a newspaper. Whereas with a book, people are reading my thoughts and ideas. My stupid haircut is nowhere to be seen.

    BNR: I think your haircut is not stupid. For what it's worth.

    JE: Well, thanks a lot. You're clearly a thoughtful, sweet person who does not write on the Internet.

    BNR: I do write on the Internet. I just try to be nice about it. You've been writing for a long time. I read that you're been working on short stories since your early teens. How did you get mixed up with Dave Eggers and his whole McSweeney's crew?

    JE: I can't remember how I discovered McSweeney's. Once I did, I realized people could write short humor with not just standup comedy. That there was this gray area between humor and character. My mind illuminated. I started writing for McSweeney's and got rejected for a few years. At one point I started getting accepted. Then I started writing for The New Yorker — again, got rejected for a few years, then finally accepted. I'm so happy I was rejected, because it forced me to really hone my skill sets. I'm in a very weird position as an actor where people will read my work — not necessarily like it, but will plan to read it just because of my position as an actor. The best thing about rejection is some injection of reality. That came from both of these experiences.

    BNR: By being rejected?

    JE: Yeah, exactly. Because if you're a motivated person, rejection is very inspiring. If you're unmotivated, rejection serves the opposite purpose. You would stop working.

    BNR: You said that because people are going to recognize your name, there's a better chance you'll get eyes on it. That's obviously true. How do you deal with that pressure of knowing people are going to read your work because of that name recognition alone?

    JE: There's two sides to that. My third play in New York was just produced. The company who produced my play — they're very well respected. They don't want to risk their reputation on an actor's play that's not good. In a way, my plays have to be better. The advantage for me is that my work is probably seen more quickly than other writers, but I think the quality of it has to be the thing. I know people will read my stuff. But right now I have to do a little more preemptive self-censorship.

    BNR: That's probably a good thing, though. Don't you think?

    JE: It's good, it's good. Given both life options, I'm happy to be living the one that I'm living. I do, in a way, kind of miss the freedom of being able to do the most crazy thing and throwing it out into the world.

    BNR: With less accountability.

    JE: Exactly.

    BNR: How do you use different parts of your brain for writing comedic short stories versus plays?

    JE: I was reading this really interesting article that John Steinbeck wrote, and he talked about — and it's wrong — but he talked about how Of Mice and Men was a failure. He said he tried to write a play but because readers have a difficult time reading plays, he tried to put elements of a novel into the book. Character descriptions, setting descriptions, writing "he said" instead of just the character's name and a colon like you would have in a play script. But otherwise he said it's the same thing. That's how I feel, too. It's the same thing. I write a lot of first- person, and that's the same as a character in a play doing a monologue. There's a real overlap. As an actor there's another element, which is embodying the emotional experience of a visual person. That's what I've been training to do since I started acting. That informs writing as well, because you're trying to understand the emotion underneath a character of fictional situations. That's a difficult and wonderful experience to have as an actor.

    BNR: I thought your ability to hone the teen voice in several different essays was really awesome. Especially the frustrated narrator Harper in "My Roommate Stole My Ramen: Letters from a Frustrated Freshman," because you were probably never a teen girl. How do you nail that? Even just the perspective in "An Email Exchange with My First Girlfriend . . . " Maybe there were some relatable elements there, like the boy's parenthetical self-conscious aside, "(he said sarcastically)"?

    JE: The truth is I have a younger sister: she calls me in her first year of college and complains about something minor with a kind of anger I've never seen from her. That happens to young people when they are experiencing some new physical transition. I told my sister how absurd she sounded and we both laughed about it. I thought of this character who is this eighteen-year-old girl who is full of rage. A rage that's never been expressed before. I thought it would be really funny to have her have rage against otherwise silly complaints, silly inconveniences. Like her roommate taking one of her soups. Because of my acting background and my sensibilities, I created this character who's not only angry but deeply lonely and desperate for some human connection. That anger actually manifests from this desperate longing to be loved. She has this roommate she hates, but she's desperate to be touched by her. She has a teacher who she thinks is attractive, but she accuses him of sexual harassment. She doesn't know how to direct her need for attention. Her way to ask for attention comes out as rage.

    BNR: It's almost as if she rejects any affection she gets. When the roommate she calls The Slutnick chases her out of the concert and tries to hug her, she's receptive and thankful for it but ultimately rejects it to continue this invented battle in her head. The teacher gives her a very off-the-cuff compliment, then she goes off to try to report him for harassment.

    JE: She talks about her parents, who never give each other any affection. So she doesn't know how to accept it. She doesn't see the gray area. She sees the teacher giving her compliments as sexual harassment. She doesn't know what affection is. She doesn't know how to take that in the way it's actually intended. Her roommate has a well-adjusted family, and she doesn't know how to accept that because she has never experienced it. She has the parents who are cold and aloof. She doesn't know how to accept real affection.

    BNR: Right. The way you're speaking of Harper's parents — who she describes as barely speaking to each other and never doing anything fun — is definitely a theme: a resounding dissatisfaction among parents. Parents maybe regretting their children, definitely regretting their marriages. The mother in "My Mother Explains Ballet to Me" saying, "Your father's the only man I've ever been with. Can you believe that?" The father in "My Prescription Information Pamphlets as Written by My Father" describing the prescriptions like "Twenty-six years married to the same woman and three Carnival Cruises together!" What brought that about?

    JE: I see this trend that is funny and also very saddening of parents speaking to their children in a way that ultimately traumatizes them. But the parents don't realize it. I'm writing about the product of narcissism. The children of narcissists turn into these damaged, introspective people. Harper's the child of clearly narcissists. The boy who goes to the ballet with his mother is with a narcissist. Narcissism is fun to write about and I've written about it a lot. It's also neat to write about what that produces. As we were talking about, they don't know how to accept affection and love. That parent has a monopoly on their child's form.

    BNR: Absolutely. The neglectful mother in "Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine- Year-Old" speaks to her son in weird jokes he doesn't get but adult readers understand. It's a premature maturation of that relationship and how that impacts the child.

    JE: Yeah, that's another avenue of how self-involved parents could have that effect on a child. In some cases the children will become their own parents, looking for advice from within instead of from the parent. I'm friends with a psychologist who deals with adolescents and tells me a lot of kids end up self- parenting. So they kids will mature prematurely — but oftentimes will have very healthy inner lives — because they had to self-parent and fend for themselves.

    BNR: I find it interesting how you chose to show how both sides of that introspection can pan out. The nine-year-old in "Restaurant Reviews" seems like he's using it in a very positive way, gaining all this wisdom like, "I guess I feel bad for people more quickly than Mom does and that is one difference I've noticed about us," and "Sometimes the things that are scariest are the ones you don't understand." Then you see Harper who is just terrified and self-sabotaging.

    JE: That's exactly right. There's two sides to the thing. They probably have the same kind of parents, and yet one child is being able to direct it toward premature self-actualization, while the other girl seems possibly permanently stunted.

    BNR: When did you start to get interested in these relationships?

    JE: It's dramatic because there's something inherently sad about parents and children not connecting with each other. I live in New York City, so I'm surrounded by these types of people — not that they don't exist elsewhere, but they certainly do exist in New York — this neurotic narcissism. I can't actually say I know people as extreme as this. I've seen people on the train like this — briefly. But I can't say I'm actually friends with people like this.

    BNR: There's this tangible fear of getting stuck in situations like this — in parenthood and marriages. These parents are clearly miserable. Do you ever think about that personally?

    JE: Yes, I think very much about it as I get older — what kind of parent I'd want to be. And I think all the time about how you don't realize that the little habits you acquired will affect a child in a way that I'd never be able to foresee. So yeah — I think about that all the time. And of course it's easy for me to criticize other parents when I don't have a child of my own. I could be the worst parent with the best intentions.

    BNR: That's what I think is one of the scariest parts. I can't imagine parents set out to be shrugging the whole time.

    JE: Exactly.

    BNR: To shift gears, how did you decide to write about Alexander Graham Bell's first five phone calls? The fourth one, specifically, is a drunk dial.

    JE: I'm very interested in history, and I read that Alexander Graham Bell made this telephone call to his assistant Watson and said, "Watson, come here. I want to see you." Actually, I think I heard this joke when I was ten years old on Comedy Central. It was a comedian saying his cellphone ringtone was Beethoven. He said, "I don't think when Beethoven was writing Symphony No. 5 he thought in 100 years someone would hear it and say, 'Oh shit. It's my mom.' " I thought that's so funny — the way modern technology has appropriated otherwise nice things for dumb modern pleasures. The way we've appropriated the activity. Like getting drunk and calling a friend. At one point the telephone was a revered wonder. I thought it'd be funny to explore the natural evolution of telephones, but within five phone calls as if to say it starts out an incredible curiosity and winds up three days later as a boring way to communicate what you're doing with your buddy.

    BNR: It was a very quick evolution.

    JE: We get used to something so quickly and then use it for something stupid. That's what happens now. Technology is being created so rapidly and the next thing you use it for is the dumb thing you used the previous incarnation for. BNR: Like sending drunk carrier pigeons?

    JE: Exactly!

    BNR: What do you think Alexander Graham Bell would think of Candy Crush and Tinder?

    JE: I don't know if he's a follower of McLuhan's "the medium is the message" but if he were, he'd probably be really upset. When I have a play in New York and I hear it's performed elsewhere, my first feeling is so excited and flattered it's being performed in a college or a different country. My next feeling is, "Oh my god. They're probably missing the point of this part." I might be wrong, but you feel protective of your creation when it's out in the world.

    BNR: How do you stop yourself from obsessing over something like that?

    JE: I have to keep in mind that I've done plays in New York and I get the best actors in the world. My last play had Vanessa Redgrave as the main character. I think I'm the luckiest playwright to have these wonderful actors in my plays, but you end up thinking that line wasn't said correctly. The way I get over it is by thinking my intention isn't necessarily the best way to do it. Once you put your own taste in perspective and realize that it's just your own, the goal is to not only collaborate but also appreciate someone else's wonderful work.

    BNR: Would you say you have a natural predisposition to want to be in control with things you create?

    JE: Yes, I do. I love working with movies, but I don't watch them for that reason. I love being in control of my acting performance. Often it makes me nervous to think it's being edited and manipulated by other people, so I don't watch the movies. That kind of burden of control is immediately lifted. When you act in a movie, the thing that you're doing on set is very far removed from the thing that's on screen. It's edited, it's underscored, it's an angle that emphasizes one part of your face. The way to ease the burden to just not to watch the thing. When writing books, you have to read things over and over again. What you don't have to do is read other people's critiques of it. Often times it's not very comfortable. People are writing critiques based on their very personal need for expression. It's not very helpful.

    BNR: Right. It's based off their own lens and experiences and interpretations.

    JE: Or a need to write something mean for whatever reason. Or by contrast, a need to write something nice, which is also dangerous.

    BNR: Why do you think that can be dangerous?

    JE: As soon as you assign value to people telling you how to do your job, then you are doing your job for some other reason. No one knows my book better than I do, and no one knows the reason I have written it better than I do, so I don't understand how it would be helpful to read somebody else's impression of it. Now if no one reads the book, and my publisher refuses to publish the next book, then I might have to start self-assessing. But until that happens, the best way to do one's job is for themselves, especially in the creative field.

    BNR: Right. But don't you feel like there could also be some value in constructive criticism, and in considering intent versus impact?

    JE: Absolutely. I think that's great and why it's nice to surround yourself with smart people who will be honest. In my experience, the Internet is not filled with those people. So the temptation to do a Google search on something you've worked on will not yield happiness or helpful results. If you surround yourself with people are thoughtful and nice and honest, I think you'll have much better odds.

    BNR: Sounds like you take the same approach many journalists do with skipping reading the comments.

    JE: I really like David Brooks, who writes for the New York Times about books. He's a conservative, as well, but he writes about sociology — which I am interested in, it's what I studied in college. I read something the other day of his about gratitude and saw over 100 comments. And they were vicious. I would not have been able to find a way to criticize this, and yet 990 people did.

    BNR: I saw Guided by Voices in high school and at one point Robert Pollard grabbed the mic and said, "Have you realized that no matter what anybody's shouting at a show, they're all saying the same thing: 'I exist'?" Commenting on the Internet can be similar.

    JE: Very interesting. Yes. "I exist." That's a very good way to put it. Also, very sad.

    BNR: How do your studies in sociology contribute to your writing? How does that afford you a different angle in writing all these first-person narratives?

    JE: I studied sociology and anthropology in school. There's been no acting class that's been as helpful, no writing class that's been as helpful as learning sociology and anthropology. What anthropology teaches you is that there is equal value to different cultural perspectives. And that is the best thing you can learn as an actor. If you're playing, for example, a villain in a movie, the most important thing is to know there's equal value to that person's perspective as there is to the hero's perspective. And once you do that as an actor, you start to defend your character's decisions — even though he's the villain. And as a writer, for example in this book, if I write about the sociological trends of divorce in the modern era and how that impacts young people — that first story is about the product of divorce, trying to navigate his relationship with his mother. And the other stories that take place in other countries, you see the funny American perspective. They're related to my studies in anthropology the way in which an isolated America — a gross generalization — but a country that's wealthy and geographically removed from a lot of other places can think the more isolated you are, the more removed you are from looking at other cultures, countries, races, ethnicities. That all informs the stuff I'm interested in, the stuff I write about — more than the short story classes I've taken.

    BNR: How do you plan to spend the release day of Bream?

    JE: [Laughs] Filming a movie, so I'll be on set. Luckily it's not like a movie, waiting for the box office response. That's the most nerve-racking experience, sitting around waiting to see if teenagers are into it. With books it's a more gradual rollout. So I've been through the wringer already. I don't really feel that nervous. I'm still comforted by the publisher, who agreed to publish it so beautifully. It's been really the nicest experience. I just wish movies had one percent of the kind of attention and calmness that the book world has.

    BNR: Do you think you'll put out another book one day?

    JE: Oh yeah. This has been so wonderful. I can't wait to do it again.

    September 9, 2015

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    “Eisenberg is truly a talented writer. . . Hilarious and poignant.”—Entertainment Weekly

    Bream Gives Me Hiccups: And Other Stories is the whip-smart fiction debut of Academy Award-nominated actor Jesse Eisenberg. Known for his iconic film roles but also for his regular pieces in the New Yorker and his two critically acclaimed plays, Eisenberg is an emerging voice in fiction.

    Taking its title from a group of stories that begin the book, Bream Gives Me Hiccups moves from contemporary L.A. to the dormrooms of an American college to ancient Pompeii, throwing the reader into a universe of social misfits, reimagined scenes from history, and ridiculous overreactions. In one piece, a tense email exchange between a young man and his girlfriend is taken over by the man’s sister, who is obsessed with the Bosnian genocide (The situation reminds me of a little historical blip called the Karadordevo agreement); in another, a college freshman forced to live with a roommate is stunned when one of her ramen packets goes missing (she didn’t have “one” of my ramens. She had a chicken ramen); in another piece, Alexander Graham Bell

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    Publishers Weekly
    07/06/2015
    The debut story collection from actor Eisenberg is a quick, witty read. The title story features the hilarious Yelp-like restaurant reviews of a sensitive nine-year-old, whose alcoholic mother drags him around to restaurants so that her ex-husband will foot the bill. The rest of the stories borrow from similar modernist tragicomic scenarios: one story is called “My Little Sister Texts Me with Her Problems”; another, “My Spam Plays Hard to Get,” features a coy email from a porn star with a passion for Chaucer; and, in more old-fashioned missives, a first-year college student chronicles her roommate woes to a tolerant teacher back home, in “My Roommate Stole My Ramen: Letters from a Frustrated Freshman.” Eisenberg’s brand of comedy is frequently compared to Woody Allen’s, and it’s easy to see why—the stories are populated with neuroses, highly difficult people, anxious mothers, and therapists; all seem to function in the same self-contained New York universe. Reading the stories requires a certain tolerance for (or delight in) cultural references. But they’re also charming, deftly written, and laugh-out-loud funny. (Sept.)
    From the Publisher
    Praise for Bream Gives Me Hiccups :

    A Fall Books Preview Selection by Audible
    One of the Wall Street Journal ’s 15 Books to Read This Fall
    One of USA Today ’s Weekend Picks for Book Lovers
    One of People ’s Best New Books

    “Eisenberg has a terrific ear, especially for adolescent inflections, absurdity, self-delusion, and insecurity. He also has a flair for off-the-wall ideas . . . With its panoply of neurotics and narcissists and its smart mix of stinging satire and surprising moments of sweetness, Bream Gives Me Hiccups brings to mind fellow comic actor/writers Woody Allen, Steve Martin and B.J. Novak. It also offers a youthful new twist on what one of Eisenberg’s hopeless dreamers refers to—ironically, of course—as the cruel ‘irony of life.’” —NPR Books

    “Compelling . . . A fascinating look into the minds of misfits . . . Whether it’s Alexander Graham Bell bumbling through his first phone calls or Carmelo Anthony of the New York Knicks pacifying a fan, Eisenberg’s ability to create interesting and entertaining dialogue as if the exchange actually occurred is impressive . . . Eisenberg’s wit jumps off the page . . . Bream Gives Me Hiccups is a delightful collection of awkward scenarios twisted into humorous, witty and sometimes poignant life lessons. It’s simultaneously smart, clever and creative.” Associated Press

    “Eisenberg’s strength is in dialogue and monologue, and in writing miserable characters who alternately compel (like a 9-year-old from a broken home who writes restaurant reviews) and repel (like Harper, the footnote-obsessed freshman Eisenberg lovingly describes as ‘maladjusted’) . . . Eisenberg is uncannily good at capturing a specific breed of insincere teen girl.” Entertainment Weekly

    “Fans of writing by Woody Allen and B.J. Novak will revel in these hilarious pieces by actor-playwright Eisenberg. Light or dark but never sweet, each is inventive . . . Relationships gone haywire provide many of the best jokes. It’s a hoot.” People (The Best New Books)

    “A great book . . . The first part of the book [is] a series of restaurant reviews Eisenberg writes in the voice of a privileged nine-year old. The reviews are hilarious but gradually reveal a moving portrait of a lonely boy’s bond with his single mom. All the stories seem to work on multiple levels like that.” —Arun Rath, “All Things Considered,” NPR

    “I love it.” —Diane Rehm, Diane Rehm Show

    “An alphabet soup of sketches, riffs, and innovations . . . Eisenberg is funny . . . with wit and insight beyond his 31 years . . . These stories remind me . . . of Steve Martin in the way they often subvert comic convention and, more significantly, in how the author empathizes with his characters . . . Eisenberg’s empathy, even more than his intelligence and wit, make him an artist worth watching.” Seattle Times

    Bream Gives Me Hiccups & Other Stories features a mixture of humor and sad stories . . . In his new collection . . . Eisenberg has some wicked fun with limousine liberals, the young and overly educated, and others from demographic groups in urgent need of satire. Yet he does so with surprising compassion and a deep feeling for the pain of human disconnectedness.” Chicago Tribune

    “It’s no surprise, perhaps, that the actor’s short stories read like scenes. What may be a surprise, however, is Eisenberg’s deft talent for playfully bringing both familiar and wholly original scenarios to life.” Marie Claire (What We’re Reading)

    “Jesse Eisenberg is as unpredictable on the page as he is on screen . . . Eisenberg’s perversely dark sense of humor gives stories bite, and the collection’s loose structure—split into nine sections, some lasting only a few pages—makes it a brisk, approachable read . . . It’s a confident step forward for Eisenberg as a writer and should pave the way for a more formal novel, with any luck.” — USA Today

    “A short humor collection overflowing with high-strung characters entangled in absurd situations.” O Magazine (A Dozen Ways to Spread the Cheer)

    “[Eisenberg’s] jittery on-screen energy seeps onto the pages of this book.” Wall Street Journal (15 Books to Read This Fall)

    “Eisenberg’s 28 stories in Bream Gives Me Hiccups range from the diary of a nine-year-old food critic to letters about stolen ramen . . . Eisenberg’s characters are lively, and his awareness of universal neuroses (yours and his alike) shows he’s more than a hobbyist.” Time (Best of Fall: Books)

    “He’s a walking ball of neuroses, a fledgling playwright, and now a short-story writer, telling tales covering subjects as varied as Pompeii and ramen.” New York Magazine (Fall Books Preview)

    “Funny and poignant, a darkly comic look at family, insecurity, and, briefly, Cameroonian separatism.” National Post

    “I was reading this book and laughing out loud over and over and over again . . . This is really good . . . Wildly funny short stories . . . Spectacular.” —WGBH/Boston Public Radio

    “The star of The Social Network and The Last Tour can also write! ‘Separation Anxiety Sleep Away Camp’ is worth the entire volume.” —SF Gate (Recommendations from Mrs. Dalloway’s)

    “Mr. Eisenberg . . . is expanding as a playwright and author . . . For those seeking hidden clues into the real Mr. Eisenberg by reading his fiction, there is no simple transparency . . . This fascination with psychology, neurosis and a mash-up of high and low culture often inspires comparisons with Woody Allen . . . Mr. Eisenberg prefers to be a creator rather than a consumer of culture.” New York Observer

    Bream Gives Me Hiccups isn’t merely comic writing of the first order; it’s an often tender, highbrow-lowbrow mash-up that encompasses everything from Chomsky and Žižek to disastrous pickup lines and pubescent neuroses. Jesse Eisenberg writes with formidable intellect and verbal dexterity, but he also has something many deadeye satirists lack: empathy with his targets. To borrow his most unforgettable character’s line, you’ll want to give his debut collection 2000 out of 2000 stars.” —Teddy Wayne, author of The Love Song of Jonny Valentine

    “Jesse Eisenberg is a deeply original comic voice. These stories are about the funniness, sadness, and strangeness of everyday life and they really made me laugh.” —Roz Chast

    “A remarkable book by an immensely talented writer.” —Andy Borowitz

    “Brilliantly witty, deeply intelligent, and just plain hilarious. If David Sedaris wrote about Carmelo Anthony, Bosnian genocide, and ramen-stealing college freshmen, it would probably come out something like Jesse Eisenberg’s Bream Gives Me Hiccups. A moving portrait of human beings at their weaker moments, and a wonderful send-up of the insanities of modern America.” —Sherman Alexie

    “I’ve been a fan of Jesse Eisenberg’s plays for years and his prose is just as winning. Bream Gives Me Hiccups is hilarious, poignant and at times so self-deprecating it makes me want to give Jesse a hug. He’s taken decades of neurosis and spun it into comedy gold.” —Simon Rich

    “Jesse Eisenberg’s hysterical and exciting stories come in the form of email exchanges, conversations in parks, and late night drunken speeches. A little boy’s restaurant reviews capture the ridiculous, inappropriate and tender relationships between single mothers and their children with an honesty that will bring tears of laughter to your eyes. Eisenberg explores the disturbing ineptitude with which we live our lives, the terrible advice we give to family members, the burden that we place on those we love, and how wonderful, wonderful it all is.” —Heather O’Neill

    “This book is so good, I read it in one gulp. Densely clustered brilliance from a consistent over-achiever, it’s funny, precise, and tender.” —Richard Ayoade

    “The debut story collection from actor Eisenberg is a quick, witty read. . . hilarious . . . modernist tragicomic scenarios . . . Eisenberg’s brand of comedy is frequently compared to Woody Allen’s, and it’s easy to see why—the stories are populated with neuroses, highly difficult people, anxious mothers, and therapists; all seem to function in the same self-contained New York universe. . . charming, deftly written, and laugh-out-loud funny.” Publishers Weekly

    “With an offbeat wit, Academy Award–nominated actor and writer Eisenberg proves to be a compassionate chronicler of absurdity . . . Reminiscent of Woody Allen’s prose experiments, these quirky and digestible stories take the form of text messages, letters, jokes, transcribed conversations, pamphlets, and, in one case, a camp itinerary for codependent children. . . Even those tales with a more traditional structure toy with expectations . . . Eisenberg’s pithy, amusing pieces . . . delight with their playfulness and insight.” — Booklist

    “Eisenberg’s stories leap from college dorms to Los Angeles to ancient Pompeii, charting socially awkward moments with tart humor. Folks will be interested.” Library Journal

    “If Jesse Eisenberg’s first fiction collection were made up of simple extended bits, in which Eisenberg takes an initial premise and wittily wrings it for every drop of comedic juice possible, the book would still be an entertaining read. What makes Bream Gives Me Hiccups more than that, however, is the dissection of social anxiety underlying each piece. Through a myriad of perspectives . . . Eisenberg relates a collective understanding of how difficult it is to both like others and also feel liked . . . Eisenberg’s characterizations are light and dexterous, and almost neurotically close. . . . Bream Gives Me Hiccups attests to Eisenberg’s understanding of our cultural moment in which art and pop are still meeting, and still clashing. . . . Rather than sacrifice reality for sentiment (or vice versa), Eisenberg vacillates between the two. The results are characters and stories that at first make you laugh, then think, then sigh.” ZYZZYVA

    “Actor Eisenberg’s debut collection impresses . . . All told, Bream Gives Me Hiccups provides something for everyone . . . Eisenberg has an excellent command of language, along with an engaging wit expressed through vivid characters . . . A delightful combination of emotional depth and satire.” Winnipeg Free Press

    “The most obvious comparison, perhaps homage, is to Woody Allen . . . Eisenberg, 31, shares the older man’s gift for putting an almost permanent wry smile on your face . . . [A] thoroughly enjoyable debut.” Esquire (UK)

    “If you haven’t yet heard of this young talent . . . you soon will. These short stories are all wonderfully original. The title story . . . is funny and heartbreaking—sometimes in the same sentence . . . Terrific.” Times (UK)

    “A sharp, witty collection . . . Clever use of dramatic irony and an entertaining streak of theatrical absurdity. An acerbic 21st-century sketch show.” Financial Times

    “Eisenberg continues to deliver both considered humour and intelligent, conversational prose . . . Bream Gives Me Hiccups is a charming and clever collection which occasionally packs a striking emotional punch . . . Eisenberg is a sharp and smart writer . . . There is a tangible presence of both style and substance in this debut collection.” Independent (UK)

    “[ Bream Gives Me Hiccups ] reads like half-written material for a stand-up comedy show, or skits for Saturday Night Live. It is all infused with the cadence of old-fashioned New York Jewish humour . . . There’s a string of character portraits, written in the first person, which show off Eisenberg’s flair for writing dialogue.” Sunday Times (UK)

    “The Oscar-nominated actor’s debut collection channels a youthful, alternative vibe that combines the innovation of the digital world with the armchair philosophizing of the slacker generation. The core group of stories, ‘Restaurant Reviews from a privileged Nine-Year-Old,’ are wisecracking, knowing and sardonic.” Sunday Telegraph (UK)

    “There’s a lot of active thinking in Eisenberg’s work . . . The world of Bream Gives Me Hiccups is full of overthinkers; a neurotic urban world populated by therapists, crammed with pseudo-intellectual references and fuelled by the anxiety of the privileged. It’s at its funniest when its characters’ neuroses overwhelm rational behaviour and make everything far more complicated than is necessary . . . An astute observer of human delusion.” Irish Times

    “The star of The Social Network makes his fiction debut with this collection of witty stories. They’re set all over the place, from modern-day LA to ancient Pompeii, and are all undeniable smart and fun reads.” Heat (UK)

    “He sure can act, and boy, can he write. The debut collection of stories by the Oscar-nominated Social Network star is well observed, friskily written and a hoot.” Tatler (UK)

    Library Journal
    04/15/2015
    Academy Award-nominated actor Eisenberg has written two plays whose reception suggests skills that bode well for a first story collection, exhibiting, as the New York Times review said of Asuncion, "sharp characterizations and engaging dialogue." Eisenberg's stories leap from college dorms to Los Angeles to ancient Pompeii, charting socially awkward moments with tart humor. Folks will be interested.
    Kirkus Reviews
    2015-06-15
    Actor Eisenberg pokes fun at our relationships to the past, each other, and ourselves in his debut collection. These humorous stories are arranged into thematic sections like "Family," "Sports," and "Self-Help." The first, fourth, and final sections—each consisting of a single, stand-alone piece—are not only the longest, but the strongest as well. The eponymous opening consists of a series of restaurant reviews by a precocious 9-year-old. He critiques a whiskey bar, an ashram, and other non-kid-friendly spots where he makes cute-but-true observations about the adult world. The story transcends this premise as the narrator's personal life comes into view. His mother's sadness permeates almost all their meals, and his most powerful insights are those aimed at his own life. Yes, he notes after a Thanksgiving with vegans, "it's really sad the way that animals are killed," but it's sad that his parents are divorced, too. He concludes, "I guess that there are a lot of sad things in the world and sometimes eating turkey with the people you love makes you happy and maybe it would make the turkey happy to know that this was happening with its body." In "My Roommate Stole My Ramen," Eisenberg uses the same winning formula. The narrator's privileged perspective leads to fleeting moments of humor, but her small and complex moments of growth are what leave a lasting mark. A few stories powerfully highlight absurdities, but many others are just plain absurd. "A Post-Gender-Normative Woman Tries to Pick up a Man at a Bar" is stale and predictable; "Marv Albert is My Therapist" plants the joke in the title; and "A Marriage Counselor Tries to Heckle at a Knicks Game" tells that same joke but reversed. These pieces read like stand-up more than story, lacking in character and emotional depth. Twenty-eight short pieces that are always playful but rarely profound.

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