Roughing It by Mark Twain | eBook

ILLUSTRATIONS
FOREWORD

ROUGHING IT
Prefatory

1. My Brother Appointed Secretary ofNevada-I Envy His Prospective
Adventures-Am Appointed Private Secretary under
Him- My Contentment Complete- Packed in One HourDreams
and Visions- On the Missouri River- A "Bully"
Boat

2. Arrive at St. Joseph-Only Twenty-five Pounds Baggage
Allowed-Farewell to Kid Gloves and Dress Coats-Armed
to the Teeth- The "Allen"-A Cheerful Weapon- Persuaded
to Buy a Mule- Schedule of luxuries- We Leave "the States"
-Our Coach-Mails for the Indians- Between a Wink and
an Earthquake-A Modern Sphynx and How She Entertained
Us-A Sociable Heifer

3. "The Thoroughbrace Is Broke"-Mails Delivered ProperlySleeping
under Difficulties-A Jackass Rabbit Meditating, and
on Business-A Modern Gulliver- Sage-brush- Overcoats
as an Article of Diet- Sad Fate of a Camel-Warning to
Experimenters

4. Making Our Bed-Assaults by the Unabridged-At a Station-
Our Driver a Great and Shining Dignitary-Strange
Place for a Front Yard- Accommodations-Double Portraits-
An Heirloom-Our Worthy Landlord-"Fixings
and Things"-An Exile-Slum-gullion-A Well Furnished
Table-The Landlord Astonished- Table Etiquette-
Wild Mexican Mules- Stage-coaching and Railroading

5. New Acquaintances-The Cayote-A Dog's Experiences-
A Disgusted Dog-The Relatives of the Cayote -Meals
Taken Away from Home

6. The Division Superintendent-The Conductor-The
Driver-One Hundred and Fifty Miles' Drive without Sleep-
Teaching a Subordinate-Our Old Friend Jack and a Pi!-
grim-Ben Holladay Compared to Moses

7. Overland City-Crossing the Platte-Bemis's Buffalo Hunt
-Assault by a Buffalo-Bemis's Horse Goes Crazy-
An Impromptu Circus-A New Departure-Bemis Finds
Refuge in a Tree-Escapes Finally by a Wonderful Method 41
8. The Pony Express-Fifty Miles without Stopping-"Here
He Comes!"-Alkali Water-Riding an Avalanche-Indian
Massacre

9. Among the Indians-An Unfair Advantage-Lying on Our
Arms-A Midnight Murder-Wrath of Outlaws-A Dangerous,
Yet Valuable Citizen

10. History of Slade-A Proposed Fist-Fight-Encounter with
Jules-Paradise of Outlaws-Slade as Superintendent-
As Executioner-A Doomed Whisky Seller-A Prisoner-
A Wife's Bravery-An Ancient Enemy Captured-Enjoying a
Luxury-Hob-nobbing with Slade-Too Polite-A Happy
Escape

11. Slade in Montana-On a Spree-In Court-Attack on a
Judge-Arrest by the Vigilantes-Turn-out of the Miners-
Execution of Slade-Lamentations of His Wife-Was Slade
a Coward?

12. A Mormon Emigrant Train-The Heart of the Rocky Mountains-
Pure Saleratus-A Natural Ice-House-An Entire
Inhabitant-In Sight of"Eternal Snow"-The South Pass-
The Parting Streams-An Unreliable Letter Carrier-Meeting
of Old Friends-A Spoiled Watermelon-Down the
Mountain-A Scene of Desolation-Lost in the Dark- Unnecessary
Advice-U.S. Troops and Indians-Sublime Spectacle-
Another Delusion Dispelled-Among the Angels

13. Mormons and Gentiles-Exhilarating Drink, and Its Effect
on Bemis-Salt Lake City-A Great Contrast-A Mormon
Vagrant-Talk with a Saint-A Visit to the King-A Happy
Simile

14. Mormon Contractors-How Mr. Street Astonished Them-
The Case before Brigham Young, and How He Disposed of
It-Polygamy Viewed from a New Position

15. A Gentile Den-Polygamy Discussed-Favorite Wife and
D 4-Hennery for Retired Wives-Children Need Marking
-Cost of a Gift to No. ~A Penny-Whistle Gift and Its
Effects-Fathering the Foundlings-It Resembled Him-
The Family Bedstead

16. The Mormon Bible-Proofs of Its Divinity-Plagiarism of Its
Authors-Story of Nephi-Wonderful Battle-Kilkenny
Cats Outdone

17. Three Sides to All Questions-Everything a Quarter-Shriveled
Up-Emigrants and White Shirts at a Discount-"Forty-
Niners"-Above Par-Real Happiness

18. Alkali Desert-Romance of Crossing Dispelled-Alkali
Dust-Effect on the Mules-Universal Thanksgiving

19. The Digger Indians Compared with the Bushmen of Africa-
Food, Life and Characteristics-Cowardly Attack on a Stagecoach-
A Brave Driver-The Noble Red Man

20. The Great American Desert-Forty Miles on Bones-Lakes
without Outlets-Greeley's Remarkable Ride-Hank Monk,
the Renowned Driver-Fatal Effects of "Corking" a Story-
Bald-Headed Anecdote

21. Alkali Dust-Desolation and Contemplation-Carson
City-Our Journey Ended-We Are Introduced to Several
Citizens-A Strange Rebuke-A Washoe Zephyr at Play-
Its Office Hours-Governor's Palace-Government Offices
-Our French Landlady Bridget O'Flannigan-Shadow
Secrets-Cause for a Disturbance at Once-The Irish
Brigade-Mrs. O'Flannigan's Boarders-The Surveying
Expedition-Escape of the Tarantulas

22. The Son of a Nabob-Start for Lake Tahoe-Splendor of the
Views-Trip on the Lake-Camping Out-Reinvigorating
Climate-Clearing a Tract of Land-Securing a Title-
Out-house and Fences

23. A Happy Life-Lake Tahoe and Its Moods-Transparency of
the Waters-A Catastrophe-Fire! Fire!-A Magnificent
Spectacle-Homeless Again-We Take to the Lake-
A Storm-Return to Carson

24. Resolve to Buy a Horse-Horsemanship in Carson-A Temptation-
Advice Given Me Freely-! Buy the Mexican Plug-
My First Ride-A Good Bucker-! Loan the Plug-Experience
of Borrowers-Attempts to Sell-Expense of the Ex periment-
A Stranger Taken In

25. The Mormons in Nevada-How to Persuade a Loan from
Them-Early History of the Territory-Silver Mines Discovered-
The New Territorial Government-A Foreign One and
a Poor One-Its Funny Struggles for Existence-No Credit,
No Cash-Old Abe Curry Sustains It and Its Officers-
Instructions and Vouchers-An Indian's Endorsement-
Toll-Roads

26. The Silver Fever-State of the Market-Silver Bricks-
Tales Told-Off for the Humboldt Mines

27. Our Manner of Going-Incidents of the Trip-A Warm but
Too Familiar a Bedfellow-Mr. Ballou Objects-Sunshine
amid Clouds-Safely Arrived

28. Arrive at the Mountains-Building Our Cabin-My First
Prospecting Tour-My First Gold Mine-Pockets Filled with
Treasures- Filtering the News to My Companions-The Bubble
Pricked-All Not Gold That Glitters

29. Out Prospecting-A Silver Mine at Last-Making a Fortune
with Sledge and Drill-A Hard Road to Travel-We Own in
Claims-A Rocky Country

30. Disinterested Friends-How "Feet" Were Sold-We Quit
Tunneling-A Trip to Esmeralda-My Companions-
An Indian Prophecy-A Flood-Our Quarters during It

31. The Guests at "Honey Lake Smith's"-"Bully Old
Arkansas"-Our Landlord-Determined to Fight-The
Landlord's Wife-The Bully Conquered by Her-Another
Start-Crossing the Carson-A Narrow Escape-Following
Our Own Track-A New Guide-Lost in the Snow

32. Desperate Situation-Attempts to Make a Fire-Our Horses
Leave Us-We Find Matches-One, Two, Three and the
Last-No Fire-Death Seems Inevitable-We Mourn over
Our Evil Lives-Discarded Vices-We Forgive Each Other-
An Affectionate Farewell-The Sleep of Oblivion

33. Return of Consciousness-Ridiculous Developments-
A Station-House-Bitter Feelings-Fruits of Repentance-
Resurrected Vices

34. About Carson- Gen. Buncombe- Hyde vs. Morgan-How
Hyde Lost His Ranch- The Great Land-Slide Case- The
Trial-Gen. Buncombe in Court-A Wonderful Decision-
A Serious Afterthought

35. A New Traveling Companion-All Full and No Accornrnodat
ions-How Capt. Nye Found Room-And Caused Our
Leaving to be Lamented-The Uses of Tunneling- A Notable
Example- We Go into the Claim Business and Fail-At the
Bottom
36. A Quartz Mill-Arnalgarnation-"Screening Tailings"-
First Quartz Mill in Nevada-Fire Assay- A Smart Assayer-
I Stake for an Advance

37. The Whiteman Cement Mine- Story oflts Discovery-
A Secret Expedition- A Nocturnal Adventure- A Distressing
Posit ion-A Failure and a Week's Holiday

38. Mono Lake-Shampooing Made Easy- Thoughtless Act of
Our Dog and the Results-Lye Water-Curiosities of the
Lake-Free Hotel-Some Funny Incidents a Little
Overdrawn

39. Visit to the Islands in Mono Lake- Ashes and Desolation-
Life amid Death- Our Boat Adrift- A j ump for Life-
A Storm on the Lake-A Mass of Soap Suds- Geological
Curiosities-A Week on the Sierras-A Narrow Escape from
a Funny Explosion-"Stove Heap Gone"

40. The "Wide West" Mine-It Is Interviewed by Higbie-
A Blind Lead- Worth a Million- We Are Rich at Last-
Plans for the Future

41. A Rheumatic Patient- Day Dreams- An Unfortunate Sturnble-
I Leave Suddenly-Another Patient-Higbie in the
Cabin-Our Balloon Burst- Worth Nothing- Regrets and
Explanations-Our Third Partner

42. What to Do Next?-Obstacles I Had Met With-"Jack of All
Trades"- Mining Again- Target Shooting-! Turn C ity Editor-
I Succeed Finely

43. My Friend Boggs-The School Report-Boggs Pays Me an
Old Debt-Virginia City

44. Flush Times-Plenty of Stock-Editorial Puffing-Stocks
Given Me-Salting Mines-A Tragedian in a New Role

45. Flush Times Continue-Sanitary Commission Fund-Wild
Enthusiasm of the People-Would Not Wait to Contribute-
The Sanitary Flour Sack-It Is Carried to Gold Hill and Dayton-
Final Reception in Virginia-Results of the Sale-
A Grand Total

46. The Nabobs of Those Days-John Smith as a Traveler-Sudden
Wealth-A Sixty-Thousand-Dollar Horse-A Smart
Telegraph Operator-A Nabob in New York City-Charters
an Omnibus-"Walk Right in, It's All Free"-"You Can't Pay
a Cent"-"Hold on, Driver, I Weaken"-Sociability of New
Yorkers

47. Buck Fanshaw's Death-The Cause Thereof-Preparations for
His Burial-Scotty Briggs the Committeeman-He Visits the
Minister-Scotty Can't Play His Hand-The Minister Gets
Mixed-Both Begin to See-"AII Down but Nine"-Buck
Fanshaw as a Citizen-How to "Shake Your Mother"-The
Funeral-Scotty Briggs as a Sunday School Teacher

48. The First Twenty-six Graves in Nevada-The Prominent Men
of the County-The Man Who Had Killed His Dozen-Trial
by Jury-Specimen Jurors-A Private Graveyard-The Desperadoes-
Whom They Killed-Satisfaction without
Fighting

49. Fatal Shooting Affray-Robbery and Desperate Affray-
A Specimen City Official-A Marked Man-A Street
Fight-Punishment of Crime

50. Capt. Ned Blakely-Bill Noakes Receives Desired Information-
Killing of Blakely's Mate-A Walking Battery-
Blakely Secures Noakes-Hang First and Be Tried Afterward-
Capt. Blakely as a Chaplain-The First Chapter of
Genesis Read at a Hanging-Noakes Hung-Blakely's
Regrets

51. The Weekly Occidental-A Ready Editor-A Novel-A Concentration
of Talent-The Heroes and the Heroines-The
Dissolute Author Engaged-Extraordinary Havoc with the
Novel-A Highly Romantic Chapter-The Lovers Separated-
Jonah Outdone-A Lost Poem-The Aged Pilot
Man-Storm on the Erie Canal-Dollinger the Pilot Man-
Terrific Gale-Danger Increases-A Crisis Arrived-Saved
as if by a Miracle

52. Freights to California-Silver Bricks-Underground Mines-
Timber Supports-A Visit to the Mines-The Caved
Mines-Total of Shipments in 1863

53. Jim Blaine and His Grandfather's Ram-Filkins's Mistake-
Old Miss Wagner and Her Glass Eye-Jacops, the Coffin
Dealer-Waiting for a Customer-His Bargain with Old Robbins-
Robbins Sues for Damage and Collects-A New Use
for Missionaries-The Effect-His Uncle Lem and the Use
Providence Made of Him-Sad Fate of Wheeler-Devotion
of His Wife-A Model Monument-What about the Ram?

54. Chinese in Virginia City-Washing Bills-Habit of
Imitation-Chinese Immigration-A Visit to Chinatown-
Messrs. Ah Sing, Hong Wo, See Yup, etc.

55. Tired of Virginia City-An Old Schoolmate-A Two Years'
Loan-Acting as an Editor-Almost Receive an Offer-
An Accident-Three Drunken Anecdotes-Last Look at
Mount Davidson-A Beautiful Incident

56. Off for San Francisco-Western and Eastern Landscapes-
The Hottest Place on Earth-Summer and Winter

57. California-Novelty of Seeing a Woman-"Well, if It Ain't a
Child!"-One Hundred and Fifty Dollars for a Kiss-Waiting
for a Turn

58. Life in San Francisco-Worthless Stocks-My First Earthquake-
Reportorial Instincts-Effects of the Shocks-Incidents
and Curiosities-Sabbath Breakers-The Lodger and
the Chambermaid-A Sensible Fashion to Follow-Effects of
the Earthquake on the Ministers

59. Poor Again-Slinking as a Business-A Model Collector-
Misery Loves Company-Comparing Notes for Comfort-
A Streak of Luck-Finding a Dime-Wealthy by Comparison
-Two Sumptuous Dinners

60. An Old Friend-An Educated Miner-Pocket-Mining-
Freaks of Fortune

61. Dick Baker and His Cat-Tom Quartz's Peculiarities-On an
Excursion-Appearance on His Return-A Prejudiced Cat-
Empty Pockets and a Roving Life

62. Bound for the Sandwich Islands-The Three Captains-
The Old Admiral-His Daily Habits-His Well Fought
Fields-An Unexpected Opponent-The Admiral Overpowered-
The Victor Declared a Hero

63. Arrival at the Islands-Honolulu-What I Saw There-Dress
and Habits of the Inhabitants-The Animal Kingdom-Fruits
and Delightful Effects

64. An Excursion-Capt. Phillips and His Turn-out-A Horseback
Ride-A Vicious Animal-Nature and Art-Interesting
Ruins-All Praise to the Missionaries

65. Interesting Mementoes and Relics-An Old Legend of a
Frightful Leap-An Appreciative Horse-Horse-Jockeys and
Their Brothers-A New Trick-A Hay Merchant-Good
Country for Horse Lovers

66. A Saturday Afternoon-Sandwich Island Girls on a Frolic-
The Poi Merchant-Grand Gala Day-A Native Dance-
Church Membership-Cats and Officials-An Overwhelming
Discovery

67. The Legislature of the Island-What Its President Has Seen-
Praying for an Enemy-Women's Rights-Romantic Fashions-
Worship of the Shark-Desire for Dress-Full Dress-
Not Paris Style-Playing Empire-Officials and Foreign
Ambassadors-Overwhelming Magnificence

68. A Royal Funeral-Order of Procession-Pomp and Ceremony-
A Striking Contrast-A Sick Monarch-Human
Sacrifices at His Death-Burial Orgies

69. "Once More upon the Waters"-A Noisy Passenger-Several
Silent Ones-A Moonlight Scene-Fruits and Plantations

70. A Droll Character-Mrs. Beazeley and Her Son-
Meditations on Turnips-A Letter from Horace Greeley-
An Indignant Rejoinder-The Letter Translated but Too Late

71. Kealakekua Bay-Death of Capt. Cook-His Monument-
Its Construction-On Board the Schooner

72. Young Kanakas in New England-A Temple Built by
Ghosts-Female Bathers-I Stood Guard-Women and
Whisky-A Fight for Religion-Arrival of Missionaries

73. Native Canoes-Surf-Bathing-A Sanctuary-How Built-
The Queen's Rock-Curiosities-Petrified Lava

74. Visit to the Volcano-The Crater-Pillar of Fire-Magnificent
Spectacle-A Lake of Fire

75. The North Lake-Fountains of Fire-Streams of Burning
Lava-Tidal Waves

76. A Reminiscence-Another Horse Story-My Ride with the
Retired Milk Horse-A Pic-nicking Excursion-Dead Volcano
of Haleakala-Comparison with Vesuvius-An Inside View

77. A Curious Character-A Series of Stories-Sad Fate of a
Liar-Evidence of Insanity

78. Return to San Francisco-Ship Amusements-Preparing for
Lecturing-Valuable Assistance Secured-My First Attempt
-The Audience Carried-"All's Well That Ends Well"

79. Highwaymen-A Predicament-A Huge Joke-Farewell to
California-At Home Again-Great Changes. Moral

A.-Brief Sketch of Mormon History
B.-The Mountain Meadows Massacre
C.-Concerning a Frightful Assassination That Was
Never Consummated

EXPLANATORY NOTES
SUPPLEMENTS
REFERENCES
NOTE ON THE TEXT

Roughing It

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