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True Heroes of Gettysburg

iUniverse, Inc.

Chapter One

What is the best way to completely disrupt a classroom? The goal is not about creating a little disturbance, where the teacher's glare can put everything back in order again, but to create such a big disruption that it would be almost impossible for the teacher to stop it once it began. But how do you do it? How can you create so much confusion that a teacher cannot help but let all of the students go home early?

That was Darrell Stouffer's dilemma as he sat by the edge of the creek, eating his lunch at midday recess. Darrell was a tall, lanky thirteen-year-old. During the past year, he had sprouted up past his father in height to stand nearly six feet tall. His weight, however, did not increase as rapidly as his height, giving him a string-bean physique.

Darrell was a bright kid. He was by far the smartest student in the one-room Dubaville, Pennsylvania, schoolhouse. Darrell's passion was reading. He read anything he could get his hands on. Mrs. Garber, the Dubaville schoolteacher, had a large library of books, and Darrell had already read each one of them at least two or three times.

Darrell had a smart-alecky attitude that sometimes got him into trouble. He loved to be disruptive in school. He was considered to be the most challenging student in class by Mrs. Garber. Darrell, along with his best friend Kenny McElroy, had carried out some of the greatest pranks in Dubaville educational history. This was the last day of school before summer recess, May 15, 1863, and Darrell wanted to play one last great prank.

"It's almost time to go back inside, and I don't have any idea of what to do to have some fun," Darrell said to Kenny, who was sitting beside him.

"You'll think of something," Kenny answered. Kenny was more interested in eating his third sandwich than in helping to think up a good practical joke. Kenny was a big, stocky thirteen-year-old. He was the largest student in school—both in height and in weight. He was a little taller than Darrell, but Kenny was solidly built. Although he was strong, Kenny was quiet and gentle and always followed Darrell around.

Kenny had two loves in his life—food and farming. His mother always sent him to school with the biggest lunch pail, stuffed with as much food as she could find. Despite the fact that he had twice as much food as everyone else, Kenny was always the first one done, and then he would go around begging for food from the other students. As soon as Kenny got home from school, he would hurry out to help his father in the cornfield. Because he was so big, he did all of the chores that a grown man would undertake. Kenny loved farming with his father, and he knew that his future would be working with the soil.

Darrell looked over at his friend fondly. "I just gotta come up with something to do before we go back in," Darrell said. "It's gotta be bigger than anything we ever did before."

"Hey, Darrell," Kenny said. "Remember when we tied Reggie Saunders's shoelaces together and then we yelled 'Fire!'? When he got up to run out of the room, he fell flat on his face. That was a real good one!"

"Yeah, but we did stuff much better than that one. My favorite was when we snuck into school at night and took out all the furniture. Remember? We hid everything behind Old Man Brinager's barn. I can still see Mrs. Garber's face when she came to school the next morning, and the only thing still there was the blackboard!"

"She was so mad. We spent the entire day moving everything back. That was fun!" exclaimed Kenny.

"Remember when we snuck out one night and caught all them frogs in the pond and dumped them in school? When everybody came the next day, them frogs were everywhere!"

"Yeah, the frogs jumped all over the place. They even jumped on some of the kids. Remember when one of them jumped on Mrs. Garber's dress, and she started screaming? I never laughed so hard in my life," Kenny said.

"It took us forever to get rid of all them frogs and clean up all of that mud that they brought in. And remember how bad that room stunk? We couldn't go back to school for almost a week until the place aired out! Now that's what I call a good prank," Darrell said. He enjoyed basking in the glory of his practical jokes.

It was more important to Darrell to have fun than it was to do just about anything else. As Benjamin Stouffer's oldest son, Darrell would one day inherit everything, including the farm and the Stouffer house. But Darrell didn't share Kenny's love of farming. He did his chores and helped his father, but he did it from a sense of duty, not from a desire to work the land.

Darrell's real interest was in the civil war that was being fought at the time between the Union and the Confederate armies. He followed the war closely in newspaper articles printed in the Dubaville Times. He wanted to join the army and be a great war hero with medals and parades in his honor, but his father refused to let him join because he was so young. So Darrell waited for the day when his father would let him enlist or when he was brave enough to run away. In the meantime, he would have as much fun at school as he could.

Darrell put his bare feet in the little creek that flowed by the school. In May, the water level was halfway up the creek's bank. The water flowed steadily and was clear and cold. By midsummer, the creek would almost completely dry up under the hot and nearly rainless Dubaville weather. Darrell splashed the water a little with his feet, and then he saw them: two small, light brown garter snakes that were making their way up the muddy bank of the creek. His mind raced, and he had an idea for the greatest caper that he had ever attempted.

"Quick! Kenny! Grab one of those snakes!" Darrell commanded.

Kenny reached over, and with one quick snatch, he was holding one of the garter snakes. Darrell now knew they were going to pull off another great stunt. Once he got that thought in his head, there was no stopping him. Darrell could see that Kenny was waiting in anticipation for him to explain the prank.

"These snakes'll be perfect for my plan, Kenny," Darrell said excitedly, grabbing the other snake.

"What're we gonna do with them—throw 'em down someone's shirt?" Kenny asked.

"Nah, Kenny, wait and see," Darrell said. "This'll be the best prank we've pulled off yet, but we need some help."

Darrell looked around and then yelled, "Hey, Timmy and Tommy! Come over here!"

Timmy and Tommy Martin were ten and eight years old, respectively. They were spoiled children, whose father always gave them anything that they wanted. The boys had the newest toys and the best clothing of anyone around. Timmy and Tommy were studious types, and they were also teacher's pets. They liked their roles as Mrs. Garber's favorites. Other students teased them for running behind Mrs. Garber and helping her in school, but the two boys didn't care.

Timmy was clumsy, tripping over almost everything in his path. He brought his lunch to school in a metal pail, which he often spilled onto the ground. To fix this problem, his father had Mr. Brinager devise a wooden lid for his pail. Even though Tommy wasn't as clumsy as his older brother, he had demanded that a lid be put on his lunch pail, too. Mr. Martin had complied. The two lunch pails with their lids were just what Darrell needed to sneak the snakes into school!

"Hey, lemme see your lunch pail," Darrell asked Tommy. "Does that lid stay on tight?"

Tommy responded, "Yeah, it stays good and tight."

Darrell held a prominent position in school. He was one of the oldest students, and he was always doing something fun. He had acquired a hero status among the younger students because of his pranks. That worship fed Darrell's need to play practical jokes and to disrupt the class.

"See these snakes?" Darrell asked. "You think they could fit in your lunch pails?" Darrell knew that they could, but he wanted the boys to feel like they were part of the planning.

"Sure they could!" little Timmy Martin exclaimed.

"I want you two to sneak these snakes into school. I'll tell you when to let 'em loose. Now don't go giggling and give this all away, you hear me?" Darrell commanded.

Being Mrs. Garber's favorites was one thing, but the great Darrell Stouffer had just asked them to be a part of one of his escapades. This made the two boys feel special, and they quickly turned their backs on their poor, unsuspecting teacher.

"What are we gonna do with the snakes, huh, Darrell?" Timmy asked.

"Just watch!" Darrell said as he and Kenny stuffed the snakes into the boys' lunch pails and closed the lids.

Darrell wasn't done. He needed more help if he was going to really turn the school upside down. He needed girls!

Timmy and Tommy had a younger sister named Tina. Tina was seven years old and every bit the teacher's pet that her older brothers were. But Tina had the loudest scream Darrell had ever heard. That was exactly what Darrell needed now. He called Tina to come over.

"Hey, Tina. Look inside Timmy's lunch pail," Darrell requested with a smile on his face. Timmy giggled and obliged by opening up his lunch pail lid.

When Tina saw the garter snake, she let out an ear-piercing screech. Most of the other students playing in the schoolyard stopped and looked at her. The Martin boys were laughing uproariously.

"Can you do that again in the classroom?" Darrell asked, excited about the volume of Tina's scream.

"You show me that snake again, and I'll yell even louder," Tina answered.

"How about jumping up on your bench to escape the snakes? You think you can do that?" Darrell was now laying out the entire plan.

"Sure. I can jump up and down if you want me to," Tina volunteered.

"You think you can get your friend Mary Lou Bolton to jump up and scream, too?" Darrell asked.

"Yeah, she'll do it. She hates snakes worse than me," Tina snickered.

"Don't go into class giggling like that. Mrs. Garber'll know something's up," Darrell ordered. "You three stay here with me and Kenny. We'll all walk in together."

Darrell thought for a moment. He needed one more thing to make his plan work. He had two girls who could scream, but he needed more. There were only two girls he could think of that would do the trick. He looked over at Kenny apologetically.

"Sorry to have to do this to you, Kenny, but I'm gonna need more help," he said. "Hey, Maggie, come over here."

"What do we need her for?" Kenny asked. "I don't wanna get near that thing."

Maggie Kirkpatrick was twelve years old, and she had a huge crush on Kenny. Some days she did nothing other than stare across the aisle of desks at him. Maggie had red, frizzy hair that she tried to braid, but it made her look like she had two big birds' nests attached to her head. She was a tall, stocky girl who liked eating just as much as Kenny did. Her friend Phoebe Johnson went everywhere Maggie did, and the two girls came over to Darrell as Maggie let out a flirtatious giggle.

"Do we really need Maggie?" Kenny pleaded.

"Yeah, she's important," Darrell replied with a little smile. "Maggie, I want you to look into Tommy's lunch pail. Tommy, show her what's inside."

When Tommy showed Maggie his garter snake, she simply grabbed it and laughed as it slithered in her hands. This was not the reaction Darrell was hoping for.

"You're not afraid of snakes?" Darrell asked.

"Nah," Maggie responded. "I think this one's cute."

"Can you be afraid of snakes?" Darrell asked.

"If you want me to be scared, I could be," Maggie said. "I can scream even louder than Tina can—if somebody really wanted me to. All you have to do is get that someone to ask me."

Darrell understood what Maggie was trying to do. She had found a way to get Kenny to do something with her. He felt sorry for his best friend, but when it came to planning pranks, personal feelings had to be put aside.

Darrell kicked Kenny in the shin. "Ask her, Kenny!" he pleaded.

"Will you scream at the snakes?" Kenny whispered, hardly audible.

"What?" Maggie said, giggling. She finally had Kenny where she wanted him.

"Will you scream when you see the snakes?" Kenny scowled and kicked at the dirt.

"I'll do it on one condition—you have to walk me home," Maggie replied.

"No way," Kenny said. "I don't want to get any of your germs!"

"Kenny, we really need Maggie's help," Darrell intervened. "Tell her you'll walk her home," and he pushed him toward Maggie.

Kenny was stuck. Darrell needed Maggie's help, and the only way to get it was for him to do something that he greatly detested, but there was no other choice. "Okay, I'll walk you home, but I ain't carrying your books or talking to you the whole way," Kenny said, feeling that at least he had salvaged something in the trade.

"And you got to get Phoebe Johnson to scream and jump up on her bench, too," Darrell bargained.

"I'll be waiting for you after school, Kenny," Maggie said as she and Phoebe giggled together.

The stage was set when Mrs. Garber rang the bell, signaling the end of lunch. With this, the small group of mischievous students moved their way excitedly toward school.

The Dubaville school's one room was composed of twenty desks, ten on each side with a small aisle separating the two sides. Instead of individual seats, the students sat two to a bench. The girls sat on the left side of the room, and the boys sat on the right. The youngest students sat up front, and the oldest students sat in the back of the room. Kenny and Darrell were in the last row of the boys' seats, and Maggie Kirkpatrick and her friend Phoebe sat behind all of the female students.

Mrs. Garber, the schoolteacher, was serious about her job—sometimes a little too serious. She carefully planned every minute of her classes, and she lost patience many times with Darrell and Kenny's disturbances. She was twenty-five years old but dressed as if she were at least twenty years older. Today, her dress was plain and drab, which made her tall, thin body look even thinner. Her blonde hair was pulled back tightly and tied into a bun. She was all business when she entered the school building.

Mrs. Garber loved reading to the students, and she was planning on reading the poem The Song of Hiawatha by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. After the poem, she was going to have a little party and give her students the cookies that she had baked the previous evening. She explained her schedule to the students after they took their seats.

"Students, I want to read one of my favorite poems to you," Mrs. Garber pronounced excitedly to the class. "It is a newer poem written by a man named Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. Let me write the name of the poem and the author on the blackboard."

This was the break that Darrell was looking for. He could hardly have wished for a longer name of a poem and its poet. By the time Mrs. Garber had finished writing the names on the board, the snakes would be out of the lunch pails.

As the teacher turned her back to the students, Darrell put his plan into action. He nodded to Timmy and Tommy to release their snakes. Even the snakes seemed to know their part in the episode, because they slithered their way across the empty aisle toward the girls' side of the room.

Darrell looked at Tina Martin, and right on cue, she started screaming, "Snakes! Look out for the snakes!"

Tina and her friend Mary Lou began jumping up on their bench. Their screams made Mrs. Garber turn to face the class, but it was too late to do anything. Once a perfect prank gets started, a teacher is powerless to stop it.

"I'm afraid of snakes!" shouted Maggie, earning her escort home. Then she and her friend Phoebe started jumping on their bench, creating even more noise than Tina and Mary Lou had made.

The rest of the girls, either sensing that they could be a part of something fun or seeing the two snakes heading toward them, began screaming and jumping. The noise and the movement must have scared the snakes, because they turned around and went scurrying back toward the boys. Then it was the boys who were screaming and jumping on benches. The whole room was bedlam. Even if Mrs. Garber had wanted to say something, no one would've heard it.

Darrell gave Tina a nod. She jumped down from her bench, arms flailing, and she and Mary Lou went running out the door. These first escapees set off a flood of students, yelling and screaming and running around the schoolhouse. The benches were flying all over the place, kids were running into each other, and Mrs. Garber just stood there with her mouth wide open.

(Continues...)

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Excerpted from True Heroes of Gettysburg by John Hinman Copyright © 2011 by John Hinman. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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