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    The Overparenting Epidemic: Why Helicopter Parenting Is Bad for Your Kids . . . and Dangerous for You, Too!

    The Overparenting Epidemic: Why Helicopter Parenting Is Bad for Your Kids . . . and Dangerous for You, Too!

    by George Glass, David Tabatsky


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      ISBN-13: 9781629140827
    • Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing
    • Publication date: 11/11/2014
    • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
    • Format: eBook
    • Pages: 240
    • Sales rank: 328,675
    • File size: 1 MB

    George S. Glass, MD, has served as a medical doctor and board-certified psychiatrist for over thirty years. He received a BA in psychology from Swarthmore College and a medical degree from Northwestern University Medical School in Chicago, and he did his psychiatric residency at Yale University Medical School. He has served as associate professor of psychiatry at Baylor College of Medicine, University of Texas Medical School, and Cornell Weill School of Medicine. He lives in Houston, Texas.

    David Tabatsky has coauthored several books, including Chicken Soup for the Soul’s The Cancer Book and the forthcoming Beautiful Old Dogs: A Loving Tribute to Our Senior Best Friends. He lives in New York City.

    Table of Contents

    A "Quick-Start" Guide ix

    Disclaimer xi

    Glossary xiii

    Introduction xvii

    Chapter 1 Arc You Overparenting? 1

    How Do You Know whether You Are Overparenting? 4

    A Color Code for Parents 7

    Parenting Archetypes 9

    Hands On/Hands Off 34

    Less Protection, More Communication 36

    Chapter 2 Why Twenty-First-Century Parenting Seems So Hard 39

    What to Expect When Everyone Is Telling You What to Expect 40

    How Did Overparenting Begin? 42

    A Brief History of Parenting 43

    The Psychology of Children 46

    Spock Talk 47

    Children of the 1960s 47

    The Changing Paradigm of Parenting 49

    Who's Minding the Store? 53

    Raising a Global Child in Today's Society 54

    The Big Three Parenting Styles 55

    Mindful Parenting 56

    Your Child's School as Co-Parent 58

    Ban Those Ralls! 61

    Whose Education Is This, Anyway? 63

    Managing Expectations 65

    Overparenting or Just Plain Dumb? 66

    The Ethical Road Is Forked 69

    Chapter 3 How Does Overparenting Happen? 71

    Defining Success 72

    In the Beginning 74

    Caution: Fragile Contents Inside 75

    Testing! Testing! Testing! 77

    Parental Aptitude Test 78

    Aptitude versus Fortitude 81

    From Playdates to Preschool: Too Much Programming 81

    To Schedule or to Chill? 82

    But What If? 84

    Do I Have to Wear a Helmet to Bed? 85

    Techno Wars 86

    Which Parents Are Most Susceptible to Overparenting? 88

    A Warning to Divorcing Parents 94

    Communication Gaps May Lead to Overparenting 95

    Who Are You Really Helping? 96

    Fighting the Odds 97

    Chapter 4 The Agony and the Ecstasy of Your Active Child 101

    Like It or Not 103

    Performance Isn't Everything 105

    The Curse of Electronics and the War of the Thumbs 108

    Louis C. K. Explains Why He Doesn't Want His Kids to Have Smartphones 110

    The Free-Play Challenge 111

    Bullying: Defining Our Role as Parents 114

    "I Coulda Been a Contenduh" 118

    Whatever Happened to Pickup Ball? 119

    Friday Night Lights to the Rescue 123

    Not Everyone Can Play Quarterback 126

    Chapter 5 How Overparenting Affects Your Child-and You 129

    Intensive Parenting 130

    The Overparenting Equation: Cause and Effect for Your Child and You 132

    Overparenting = A Lack of Trust 136

    Overparenting = Inadequate Life Skills 137

    Overparenting = Fear of Failure 139

    Overparenting = Reduced Self-Esteem 141

    Overparenting = Feelings of Entitlement 143

    Overparenting = Lack of Creativity 144

    Overparenting = Irresponsible and Unaccountable Young Adults 147

    Overparenting = Bad Role Modeling 148

    Overparenting = Inept Children 149

    Overparenting = Increased Anxiety 151

    Overpareniing = Compromised Resilience 152

    Does Overparenting Affect You, Too? 153

    Which Child Is Yours? 155

    Chapter 6 The Long Arms of Overparenting 161

    The Technology Trap 161

    East versus West 166

    Considering Independent College Counselors 168

    When Parents Can't Let Go 172

    The Effects of Overparenting on College Graduates 174

    How Overparenting Affects You as a Parent 176

    Choosing a Different Path 177

    Chapter 7 Looking Forward and Letting Go 181

    Whose Success Are You Really Seeking? 182

    Through the Looking Glass:

    A Personal Note from George S. Glass, MD 184

    A Prescription for Healthy Parenting 187

    A Cautionary Tale from the Tabatsky Files 188

    The Trickle-Down Effects of Stay-at-Home Dads 189

    What Children Re-ally Want Their Parents to Do with Them 190

    The Parenting Paradox 192

    Acknowledgments 195

    About the Authors 197

    Notes 201

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    Helicopter parents, tiger moms, cosseters, hothouse parents . . .

    Whatever we label it, overparenting—anxious, invasive, overly attentive, and competitive parenting—may have finally backfired. As we witness the first generation of overparented children becoming adults in their own right, many studies show that when baby boomer parents intervene inappropriately––with too much advice, excessive favors, and erasing obstacles that kids should negotiate themselves––their “millennial” children end up ill-behaved, anxious, narcissistic, entitled youths unable to cope with everyday life. The obsession with providing everything a child could possibly need, from macrobiotic cupcakes to 24/7 tutors, has created epidemic levels of depression and stress in our country’s youth, but this can be avoided if parents would just take a giant step back, check their ambitions at the door, and do what’s really best for their kids.

    Written by a noted psychiatrist and a parenting specialist, The Overparenting Epidemic is a science-based yet humorous and practical book that features an easy-to-read menu of pragmatic, reasonable advice for how to parent children effectively and lovingly without overdoing it, especially in the context of today’s demanding world.

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